Life Inspiration

Are you going to committ to your New Year's Resolutions this year?

2011-01-03T12:05:00.000-04:00

And so Monday is here again. But not just any Monday. The first Monday of a new year. You have now reached the days and hours when you will decide wether those New Year's Resolutions will become firm committments or remain symbolic phrases uttered during the festive mood of the New Year's Eve.

Many of us are familiar with the scenario where we start out in the new year with the best of intentions; we're going to loose weight, stop smoking, turn our business around, spend more time with our family a.s.o. Only to find that a few weeks or months later we're at the same weight, back taking breaks for a smoke, struggling with our business the same way as last year and not seeing our kids nearly as much as we would like.

Since this in turn can easily make us feel like failures and make us miserable some are arguing that we should forget about those New Year's Resolutions all together. I disagree.

There is a kind of magical positive energy around starting out into a new year. And of course you should make use of that feeling and enthusiasm. Just because you didn't realize the goals you set out for yourself last year doesn't mean you can't. It just means you need to do something differently, with emphasis on DO and DIFFERENTLY.

A New Year's Resolution means you have something in your life that you want to change. To realize change you need to take action, different action, or take actions in a different manner, than you have up to now.

Following habits and doing things the way we are familiar with and accustomed to is easy. Creating new habits and doing things in new ways that we are unfamiliar with and not used to can be challenging and takes some effort.

And in order for you to choose to take the path that actually doesn't appear to be the easiest one you must be really motivated, really committed, really aware of where you are going and really clear on what your next step is going to be. And you need to keep yourself motivated, committed, aware of your end goal and clear on your next steps throughout the whole process.

Does it sound complicated? It doesn't have to be.

It is just a matter of asking yourself, and answering, a few more questions than just "what" your New Years Resolution is. And as usual there are a number of tools and services available to assist you.

Below are a few of my favourites, that can help you take charge and "carve out" your plan, help you hold yourself accountable, support you in staying motivated, make sure you know exactly what to do next and more:

A personal coach and/or mentor
Being part of a Master Mind Group and/or group coaching program
100 Day Challenge from "the Goals Guy" Gary Ryan Blair - start fast finish strong
"super coach" Michael Neill's Creating the Impossible: Transform Your World in 30 Days - an online experience
my article 9 Steps to Realizing Your New Year's Resolutions

I wish you A Happy New Year - take charge and may it become all that you want it to be!

Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
http://www.eminentcoaching.com/

p.s. What are your favourite tools, tricks, tips for realizing goals or New Year's Resolutions?

Things to be happy about in wintertime

2010-12-02T07:59:00.001-04:00

Here in Sweden it's wintertime, it's dark, it's cold, it's snowy, it's often icy and we mumble, mown, sigh and complain.
Why not take a more positive approach. Winter comes every year. And with winter, at least here in the nordic countries, comes December. A month that presents many of us with occasions to come together and meet family and loved ones.

Put your focus on that which is worth celebrating and rejoicing about! That which really is something to pay attention to, to highlight and to make the most of.

/Helena"Lev livet som Du vill"http://www.eminentcoaching.com/startsida.htm

You can empower yourself to change your life

2010-11-11T07:31:00.000-04:00

Are you unhappy with your life circumstances?
Do you feel in desperate need of change?
Well, then you deserve something else. And you can have something else.
However it is not likely to be dropping down from the skies.
You have to make it happen! And you can!

Regardless of your circumstances you can change your life. Because it all starts in your mind. Not with money, not with circumstances. It starts with your mindset. It starts by going from feeling like a victim to taking charge and empowering yourself.

And the way to do that is by asking yourself a simple, yet powerful question?

What am I going to do about it?

The answer may not come easily, be simple or even uncomplicated. But asking yourself that question is a powerful starting point. By asking that question you have taken back the power and control of your life, and placed it where it belongs, in your own hands.

By starting to look for the answer to that question you have begun to change your life. You are now open to finding steps to take. You are now looking for options and a way out, and this is necessary for them to become visible to you.

Step by step you can now go on your journey towards the life you want, the life that you deserve.

It may not happen instantly but you have set the wheels in motion.
Keep a sharp lookout and be prepared to jump on the train to a new destination.

/Helena Berggren "Live life Your way" www.eminentcoaching.com

p.s. Someone who is well familiar with such a journey is Catriona Welsby. On November 16th she will share her story and tell you what she did, in spite of limited resources, very little time and without support, to turn her life into a Cinderella-story. Find out the details here.

Time to clear out the closet

2010-08-24T11:51:00.005-03:00

The other day a read an article on clearing out your closet. The principle was to first empty out all the closet content and then only put pack that which one really used, liked and could wear. And I quickly realized what a pleasant change such a make-over would of my closet would be, how much smoother it would work and how much better I would feel whenever I opened the closet door.
What if one could apply the same principle to everyday life? Why not!

Our daily routines, work assignments and tasks might be a little hard to physically ”empty out on the bed” but imagine your calendar being all cleared and your days all blank. If you know got to choose, of all that has been part of your everyday life previously during the year, what would you like to keep and continue? You write those things down in your calendar and note them on your list of routines/chores/activities (at least in your mind).
But all those things that have felt negative, stressful and burdened you conscience because you never got to them – Why not refrain from “hanging them back” into your everyday life?
Put it all in a separate pile, perhaps as notes on post-its or points on a list.

That pile of clothes you either don’t fit into anymore, haven’t used for over a year or really don’t like – you go through that and decide for each garment whether to throw it away, sell it or perhaps give it to some charitable cause.
In the same manner you can take each post-it or point on your list and decide for yourself whether it is something you can just give up on or quit, something you can delegate or turn over to someone else or something you can deal with differently so it becomes something positive instead.

Take an example:
On my list of things that I don’t whant to ”hang back” again into my everyday life is stressful mornings with my kids. Well, I can’t very well quit on them (the sun tends to come up every morning, new days take their beginning, kids have to go to school and I have work waiting etc..). My spouse is no early bird so I cannot very well turn the morning chores and activities over to him. That leaves creating morning routines that work differently so the mornings become more positive and stressfree.

In my case the solution will be setting my own alarm clock a bit earlier than for the rest of the family so I get some time to get myself ready before having to deal with other morning chores + start waking up the kids a bit earlier than I have done before to allow them more time to calmly get ready.
If I succeed in introducing everyday mornings like that it will be like having hung a fresh new comfortable garment, in a size that fits me, and in which I feel energized and well dressed, into my closet.

Time to clear out what I can do without! How about you?

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Take Charge over your attitude towards fate

2010-04-26T07:31:00.000-03:00

Do you have a need to be in control, with everything scheduled, planned and timed?
Don’t get me wrong. I do not believe there is anything wrong with being organized. But if you find yourself trapped in “this won’t work.., darn’ it.., I’m toast.., life hates me… land”, when things don’t run as smoothly as you have planned, finding ways to “ease up” on blaming fate for recklessly playing with your life, might actually give you a smoother ride.

I have a life motto today that says “Everything that happens in my life and comes my way does so for a positive reason, even if I cannot see what it is in the moment”.

It does not mean that I never get upset, frustrated or stressed when things don’t go as planned. However it does keep me from falling in to a pit of negativity, irritation and “colorful outbursts”.
Instead I find myself curiously looking for whatever possible positive angle there might be of the situations I find myself in. And that in turn leaves me open to finding new alternatives and solutions a whole lot quicker. Not to mention staying in a lot better mood, regardless of the circumstances.

I encourage you to adopt an attitude of “there is something positive in everything” at least for a couple of days, and especially when things are not turning out as you have anticipated or planned. Take note of what you experience. Will there be a difference to how you normally feel and react to things going on around you?

There might well be such a thing as “Fate”, but you can choose how to react to it’s whims.

Enjoy life!

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Take Charge of Your LIfe with Success Habits

2010-04-19T05:51:00.000-03:00

To be, and stay, in charge of your life you need to have habits, people and structures in your life that support you in doing so.

To take charge of your life you need to know what you want your life to be like, where you want to go and most importantly be clear on what matters the most to you. I wonderful tool that can help you desern all of that is the Passion Test (I use the Passion Test with most of my coachng clients at one of their first sessions with me, almost regardless of what he/she wants/needs to work on, because it is powerful and adaptable to almost any issue in life).

Once you are clear on what you are passionate about, taking charge and transforming your life becomes a lot easier. Most likely it will involve some changes and to support you with those changes you might need to form some new habits.

The bestselling authors of the Passion Test, Chris and Janet Attwood, have written about "How to Cultivate Success Habits" on their blog. Their suggestions can be applied by anyone, regardless of wether you have taken the Passion Test or not.

Go and get some inspiration here:
How to Cultivate Success Habits by The Passion Test

Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Change without turning everything upside down

2010-04-14T06:51:00.003-03:00

Change sounds so big and sometimes it appears as if it requires turning everyday life upside down. But that does not have to be the case.

As you know change often starts within. Maybe with a dream of something new or different, maybe with a dissatisfaction with how something is.
To actually have the thought ”I wish..”, ”I want..” is a first step towards changing something.

Change can also often simply be about your attitude or your perspective. In those cases there is no need for big, revolutionary visible actions in order to accomplish change. It may be enough to just reflect, listen to inspirational speakers, read and be introduced to other people’s thoughts about the issue and to receive questions that open your eyes to new alternatives and points of view.

Change is constantly happening around us. Both on a large scale and a small scale, whether we want it or not.
You can choose to passively just accept and stand by watching, and if you are happy with life and feel good that is perfectly fine. Or you can choose to actively participate and take charge in influencing the changes, especially if you have things you want to see change, or things you want to achieve or things you want to get away from.

Change is an inevitable part of life, but it is up to you how you let it impact your life. You can choose to actively take charge of changes in your life, or you can choose to passively simply experience the changes going on around you.

Either way, when it comes to Your own life, let it be Your choice.

Tip! If you want to find inspirational speakers and writers I highly recommend stopping by Hay House and Hay House Radio.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

6 Steps to Take Charge over the Flu

2010-03-31T08:35:00.001-03:00

Knockedout! Exhausted, flat out in bed with a fever, runny nose and up-set stomach. The Flu. Few things in life makes you feel so out of control, and in the hands of circumstances you cannot influence. Life has really thrown me a challenge this time.
O.k. How does one Take Charge over the Flu?

Well. First of all I am all for positive thinking. However, I do recognize that when your health condition is such that you can barely stand up on your own two feet, and only open your eyes long enough to feel the daylight sting your eyes and remind you that yet another day has just passed you by, thinking “happy thoughts” may be a stretch.
(Or as my mother put it when she got sick the other week - “The only up-side to being sick is getting more time to read, and I don’t even have energy to do that”).

So, let us instead make use of that place of “I feel awful”, “I don’t have time to just lay in bed”, “I’m going to miss..”. Indulge yourself for a minute. Wallow for a while in all that self pity. For instance, you say you are feeling awful – in what ways? Yes, go ahead. Let all those feelings of misery out. Your head hearts, your body feels heavy, you cannot even watch television, you need a shower but don’t think you can stand up straight long enough, you have no appetite… and so on.

Well, being sick really has a grip on you doesn’t it? Want to turn the tables around?

I’m not saying you can snap your fingers and all of a sudden you will be ready to run the marathon. But you can actually take charge over your flu, and feel a heck of a lot better. Interested? Well, here comes the first step:

For every manner in which you are currently feeling god awful I want you to state something about your current situation that is if not good, so at least o.k. For instance; If you don’t have any appetite you can say to yourself –“ Well, at least I can sip some water now and then and keep my fluids up”, or if you are too tired to do anything but lay in bed, you can remind yourself –“Well, at least I can rest here in good conscience with no dog to walk/no kids to pick up from school (or something similar that is true for you).

Congratulations! By initiating this shift away from how bad you are feeling towards things that are actually positive for you, you have started to take charge over the flu, as opposed to letting it totally dominate you.
I encourage you to stay in charge by continuing with the steps below:

2. List ways in which you are actually o.k, ways in which you are in fact not ill.
3. Take note of things you actually can do (gaze out at nature through your window, listen to music..).
4. Consider what is “good” timing about having the flu right now (i.e. you got to attend that important meeting last week, you will be fit for fight for X next month..)
5. Think about what you can do/ask someone to do for you, to make yourself as comfortable as possible while recuperating ( i.e listen to your ipod, surround yourself with some extra pillows in bed, indulge in your favorite candy, watch uplifting comedies..).
6. Decide on a reward for yourself when you have recovered (a day at the spa, your favorite dinner food, buy yourself some new.., take time to..).

To your recovery, and to staying in charge of your own life.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

p.s. I’d love to hear if this was of any help to you, or someone you know. Do you have any “tricks” of your own to keep your mood up when feeling ill? Tweet, DM, comment or e-mail me.

Do you really know what self esteem is?

2010-02-17T12:52:00.005-04:00

If you have read any self-help books or done
some self development work I am sure you have
noticed that you need to distinguish things
like self confidence and self esteem.

There is no doubt that having high self confidence
can be a great asset in life, and a big advantage
when you choose to live life the way you want. And
there is plenty of material out their on how to
build and improve self confidence.

But high self confidence does not necessarily mean
good self esteem. And if you really want to enjoy life,
whitch you truly deserve to, having good self esteem
is crucial.

But what is self esteem? Well, it is one of those
terms that is sometimes easier to clarify by talking
about what it is not. Like my colleague, and self esteem
coach, Liv Miyagawa does in her article What Self-Esteem
is Not. You can read it here and maybe get a new viewpoint
on how to take charge and work on your own level of
self-esteem.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

On this Valentine´s Day

2010-02-14T09:31:00.004-04:00

On this Valentine´s Day
I am grateful for the opportunity to inpire others.
I appreciate the tools, the training and the experiences
I have been given.
And my heart is filled wiht love for my children, friends
and family,
for the people who's lives I get to touch,
and for the life lessons I have yet to learn.

On this Valentine's Day
I wish for everyone around me
to follow their life passions
and enjoy the fulfillment of their own dreams.

Happy Valentine's Day everyone!

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Beating the Monday morning blues

2010-02-08T03:21:00.003-04:00

Did you wake up this morning just wanting to crawl back under the covers and forget all about the new week starting today? Well, in that case you are not alone.
I have a question for you though: What do you think your up-coming week would be like if you woke up on the Monday morning feeling enthusiastic and energized instead?

If you think about it , Monday morning blues is for most of us something we have inflicted upon ourselves. The good news being that it means we are most likely fully capable of transforming it into a more favorable state of mind, if we just own up to it.

If you are serious about waking up next Monday morning with a new more positive outlook on the week ahead, I encourage you to take a closer look at what is behind your feeling of Monday morning blues.

In most cases Monday morning blues can be dealt with from one of two angles:

1) Ask yourself what you are feeling blue about?
Reflect on what it would require for you to feel more positive about it instead. Decide on what action you can take to fulfill that requirement.

Ex: Are you dreading another full working week because you are in conflict with your co-workers?
Would you feel more positive about going to work if: you had actively worked on resolving the conflict, spoken your mind about it, agreed upon having differences of opinion and called a truce with your co-workers, or is there something else that needs to happen or be changed?
What steps can you take to contribute to turning the situation around?

2) What is causing your Monday morning blues?

Get honest with yourself.
Is weekend partying stealing to many of your sleeping hours causing you to wake up with a sleep deficiency? Then the solution is quite obvious is it not?
Are too many Sunday evening wire down drinks having an adverse effect on your following morning? Not too many question marks concerning how to turn this around either, is there?

Is the feeling of not getting to see a special friend until the next weekend just killing you? Reflect on how you could actively stay in touch and perhaps create little “mini meets”, perhaps using modern technology like video chatting. Or maybe just setting aside time now and then during the week to sit down and write to your friend as if he/she was right there beside you, listening to your words, would make you feel closer to one another?

From either perspective having the Monday morning blues is in most cases something you have a choice about. So I ask you again: What do you think your up-coming week would be like if you woke up on the Monday morning feeling enthusiastic and energized instead? And if your answer appeals to you I encourage you to Take Charge and beat that Monday morning blues.
I know you can, if you really want to.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

After the rain comes the sun

2010-02-04T12:41:00.002-04:00

Today, as I maneuver my car on slippery roads with a very firm grip of the steering wheel, I reflect on how the ever changing weather is much like life. Sometimes there are clear blue skies and we can walk steady on cleared paths, on other days strong winds pull us in different directions and pouring rain obstruct our view of what lies ahead.

And I realize that this is really a good thing. Just imagine how boring it would be if our path always looked exactly the same, if there was nothing to warrant us to turn our heads and look for alternative paths or something to encourage us to try a different kind of transportation.

How would we grow if we never tried anything new, how could we appreciate the days when the sun shines and the birds are singing, if we didn’t know what it was like with pouring rain and storming winds?

So I join my neighbors shoveling snow to clear our drive ways, straining our backs and sighing as we look at the dark skies and their promise of even more snow. But try to redirect my thoughts towards spring and summer and how much more I will be able to appreciate the warmer, lighter and hopefully dryer seasons, because I have the privilege of experiencing true winter.

In the same manner, when we struggle with our work, studies, relationships, or other aspects of life, perhaps some comfort and encouragement can be found to work through those challenging times by thinking ahead.
Just as the skies clear after rain, and spring and summer follow after winter, so will periods of time when everything in our life will run smoothly, feel light and easy, follow after more challenging times.

So hang in there.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Taking charge of challenges

2010-02-03T09:54:00.003-04:00

The car is trapped in my garage, I have come down with some kind of flu/cold and we just seem to be getting more and more snow.
In other words my positive attitude and energy levels are severely challenged. So I guess it is time to really practice what I preach.

Sometimes challenging or negative thoughts, or circumstances, seem to add up and/or get stuck in our minds, and it seems we just can’t let go of it long enough to switch our mind to more positive things and/or a more pleasurable attitude.

In such cases I do not believe in just “swiping” the challenging stuff “under the rug”. Rather I recommend facing those challenging thoughts head on, one by one. Instead of having them control you, take charge over them, by dealing with them one by one, and turning them into something less challenging/more positive/new alternatives or options.
Sometimes more easily said than done, but definitely worth I try.

And today, apparently, it is my turn. And hopefully this example can serve as inspiration for you, next time you feel you can’t get those negative thoughts out of your mind.

Starting with that car that is trapped in my garage , (i.e. I cannot get the garage door open).
What is it that annoys me/is negative with this?
Well, the practical consequences. I have my 6 year old to pick up from school this afternoon.
So what other alternative ways/options are there to getting him home?
1) Ask if he can get a ride with one of our neighbors when they pick up their kid at school.
2) Check if his dad can get of work a bit early today and pick him up on his way home.
3) Walk.
4) Use the bus.
5) Give my partner a ride to and from his workplace, and thus having access to his car during the day.
O.k. In other words there are options, and I’m bound to find one that works for solving my immediate problem from not being able to use my own car.
This certainly brings my irritation level over the matter down and gives me energy to more easily start thinking about how to solve the issue of actually getting the car out. But first I need to transform the other challenges that are draining my energy.

Dealing with the health issue of this cold/flu.
What is it that annoys me/is negative with this?
Being exhausted, having no energy and thus not feeling capable of doing the things I had planned for today.
What are the up-sides/could be considered positive about this situation at this time?
Well, I don’t have scheduled meetings, coaching sessions or lectures, i.e. things involving other people, planned for today or tomorrow – so I don’t need to reschedule and I do get a chance to “rest up” for a couple of days before that becomes a factor.
The things I do have planned for today are
1) not with any immediate deadlines, so they can be done later
2) mainly to be done on my computer or over the phone, so I can do what I feel up to from my lap top, in bed if needed
Not being well
1) reminds me to go over my eating habits, nutritional supplements, exercise routines etc. making sure I do what I can to boost my immune system
2) prompts me to activate the knowledge I have and the good advice and ideas I have been given, for recovering as soon as possible (i.e. vitamins, medications, garlic, extra rest..etc)
3) gives me cause to spend some extra time just caring for myself
4) shows how blessed I am, as my loving supportive partner steps up and does what he can to make it easier for me when these circumstances call for it
O.k. So I feel lousy, but it will pass and the world won’t go under while I put emphasis on my own recovery. Encouraging.

That leaves these somewhat extreme winter conditions (the snow on the balcony outside my bedroom window has actually piled up to almost reaching the top of the rail, i.e. reaching up to my waistline).
What is it that annoys me/is negative with this?
1) the cold temperatures (I am no true Viking)
2) the roads not being properly cleared of the snow, making it difficult to drive and being on time
3) having to dress in layers on top of layers feeling like a stuffed animal when going outside, only to sweat like a pig once inside of the car or popping indoors for shopping
What are the up-sides/could be considered positive about this situation at this time?
1) the possibilities for the children to learn ice skating
2) seeing the children (and you others) who enjoy playing in the snow
3) the fantastic photos I can take of this winter landscape
4) how the snow gives more light to this otherwise very dark period of the year
In other words, I guess I feel the good outweighs the bad.

Of course, the challenges I faced today are really “luxury problems”. I am sure many people face more severe or apparently more difficult problems.
But the thing is that you can use the same principle also on bigger issues. With a little courage you can take charge and be back in control.

Actually taking a closer look at what it is you have to deal with, looking for whatever small positive things there is to be found about the situation, and opening your mind to looking for potential alternative ways to change or solve the consequences that follows with it, you will get new positive energy.
And positive energy can change your life.

To taking charge over challenges,

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Have you taken the chance to contribute?

2010-01-27T09:24:00.004-04:00

Do you sometimes feel you would like to contribute on a larger scale in the world? Do you sometimes think “I would like to help spread a positive message”, only you don’t have the possibility to, or feel like, taking time out from your everyday life to do it?
Well, the world is changing. Modern technology provides us all with opportunities to contribute too whatever causes we feel a connection, with a simple click of a button.

I believe that we all contribute to the world at large, though most often on a smaller scale, with whatever we do our say in our everyday lives.
Sometimes though, I get a feeling of wanting to do more. To spread a positive message on a grander scale, right now. Do you ever feel like that?

Here are just a few suggestions for how:

6 Ways to contribute by the click of a button

1) Send e-mails, or instant messages through your social networks (e-mail list, Facebook, Twitter …etc)

2) Put up a blog post or comment on others’ blogs addressing discussions you want to contribute to

3) Right an article and post it to one or more article directories (www.goarticles.com, www.ezinearticles.com , www.articledirectory.com …)

4) Look for interest groups and post or comment on their forums

5) Search for the web pages of interest groups and look for ways they suggest that you can contribute/take action

6) Put the question out there! i.e. pose a question to whatever social networks you are part of (Facebook, MySpace, Twitter, LinkedIn..etc): “Does anyone know of ways to contribute to….”

So how are you going to contribute today?

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Read the full article here!

Happy 2010 everybody!

2010-01-12T14:25:00.002-04:00

I’m now returning to work step by step after the holidays. And even though I’ve encountered some technical challenges that are delaying some of my product- and service launches, I do feel that 2010 promises to be an exciting year. I look forward to sharing several new things with you all, that I hope will be of interest and benefit to you. So stay tuned!
(If you are not already a subscriber of my mailings, do opt-in using the form on either my blog or website to be the first to know what I have going on).

For now I would like to remind you of your New Years Resolutions.
Did you make any? Have you taken action to start realizing them?
Or perhaps opted to skip that part this year, did you?

I do encourage you to take advantage of the “fresh start” atmosphere and “new beginnings” energy that is still floating around us.
To help you take charge and get started with those New Year Resolutions take a look at this article: 9 Steps to realizing Your New Years Resolutions.
Best of luck.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Timeout from the holidays

2009-12-29T10:44:00.003-04:00

Like many others I am enjoying the holidays. Spending a lot of extra time with my children, meeting up with aunts, cousins, brothers, parents and friends. For most of the time really pleasurable, but unavoidably at times also somewhat stressful.

Most of us look forward to these days of holiday cheer. However, as with most things these days, we tend to demand quite a lot of ourselves.
It is not unusual for us, especially the women, to more or less turn our selves inside out to fulfill the expectations of our children, please all our in-laws and create the perfectly decorated holiday home.

There is nothing wrong with this of course, quite the opposite in my opinion. The Christmas holidays are a great time to let your inner child out and go somewhat overboard. So by all means, I encourage you to put a big smile on your face and go a bit crazy.
Just be mindful of keeping it all in that cheerful holiday spirit.

It is so easy to get caught up in our visions for the perfect holidays. If you loose sight of what is truly most important to you, you might find yourself running around trying to accomplish every little detail.

Allow yourself a timeout now and then, a break from all those holiday activities and family gatherings. A pause, with some time reserved just to care for you.
Just imagine; an hour’s pampering at your local beauty salon or massage therapist, a walk in the quiet winter forest, a few minutes behind the headphones with soothing music, a bath in a candlelit room..
How would that influence your experience of this very special time of year?

I wish you joyful holidays, spent the way you want.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Life isn't all bad, is it?

2009-11-27T07:40:00.001-04:00

Thanksgiving has just kicked off the holidays and one message after another on the subject of gratitude has reached my Inbox the last couple of days. Inspired by these I began reflecting and listing things that I am thankful for at this moment in time.

I am thankful for

- my life partner and his loving unconditional support
- my two children with the twinkle in their eyes, contagious laughter and continuous challenging of my world view, thoughts and decisions
- family members and friends who bring love and light to my life
- all the wonderful tools, inspirational books and people in the world, from whom I am given the opportunity to learn and grow
- having modern appliances like the dishwasher and washing machine, to ease my everyday household work
- this years long autumn, sparing us from having to bring out the winter boots and snow shuffles (here in the Stockholm region so far anyway :-)
- access to the forest right outside my door, to ground me and relax my mind from the modern buzz of internet, tv and mobile phones
- …

I found that I could keep writing, from little things like "the smile on my son's face when he greets me after school" to larger projects like "having completed a new coaching program" and on to "making new friends".

And so I am reminded that we can actually choose to take our mind away from all the negative media reporting, the injustices of the world, tough economic climate etc. And if we for a while focus on things that make us smile, we can often find quite a number of things that are good about living. This can make our everyday life feel lighter and we can go about our day feeling more positive.

After all, having the gift of living another day isn't such a bad thing, is it?

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Turning something bad into ”the best thing”

2009-10-20T16:22:00.004-03:00

As a participant in an ICA hosted teleseminar earlier today, I was asked the question “What is the best thing that happened to you this week?”
It is a powerful question as it immediately brings the respondent into a positive frame of mind, and I often ask it myself for just that purpose.
However, in this instance it was my spontaneous response that interested me.

My response was “the stubborn and hard to get rid of virus that hit my computer this week when I have to finish two significant projects with a deadline on Monday”.

How could it be that something that has caused me frustration, loss of a whole days working hours and still limits my access to gathered documents for my projects, could feel like “the best thing”?

Well, I guess it has to do with how I have dealt with it (apart from consulting my computer savvy life partner numerous times over the phone trying to get rid of the darn thing).
Once I had spent that first day fruitlessly trying to rid myself of the virus, I found myself getting really focused (out of necessity with the upcoming deadline I guess) on how to complete my projects.
What information did I really need and what could actually be left out?
What other means could I use to gather and work through the data I needed?
How and what pieces of information were critical to save, etc.?

Once I now sit down to work on my projects I am efficient and extremely focused. I am very aware of my deadline of course, but not stressed out about it (at least not yet, come Sunday might be another matter ;-).

So how did this shift of perspective come about?
I think it was when I found myself forced to ask “How can I make it possible for myself to actually accomplish the completion of these projects given the circumstances?”Reflecting on possible answers allowed me to lower the high demands of perfection that I had placed on myself, and feel okay with it. After all there are parameters set for these projects that ensure that they meet the standard required. I.e., if I produce an end result that meets those standards I can be really happy with what I have done, because it will mean that I have delivered what has been asked of me. And I will have done so even when faced with unexpected challenges.

It is of course nice to exceed other people’s expectations. But sometimes, easing up on yourself gives an equally pleasing feeling.

Lesson learned – When we have a lot going on at the same time it can be an accomplishment worth being proud of to just getting the things done.

Besides, I really feel I “walked my talk today” living up to my own life motto of “what ever comes my way does so for a positive reason, even if I cannot se what that is in that moment”.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

p.s. Did you know that ICA (International Coach Academy) now offers a number of FREE teleseminars open to everyone interested in improving their lives by using coaching techniques. Check it out here.

Looking at the bright side

2009-10-09T09:47:00.003-03:00

The temperature is dropping, the sunlight hours decreasing and cold viruses are flourishing here in Sweden. But, as usual, there is an upside to it all.

My partner left the house this morning with a sexy raspy voice, soar throat and slight fever. (It is the last day of the seminar he is conducting so a sick day was not an option).

He calls me up from his cell phone a while later with renewed energy in his voice. From a broadcast on the radio he just learned the following:
1) The chillier autumn climate here in Sweden does not pose a favourable environment for the Swine flu, so it is not spreading as rapidly as was first predicted.
2) Having an ordinary cold virus that affects your mucous membranes actually causes them to be non receptive to any other virus, including the Swine flu.

So “bless you” has taken on true meaning again.

In other words, stop complaining about the cold and if you have a cold, be grateful for your runny nose and sore throat.
You currently don’t have to worry about the Swine flu and the longer you and others are carrying around an ordinary cold virus the less people are getting sick with the flu, the more are getting inoculated and thus the more we can halt the spread of the Swine flu.

Bless you!

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

When life throws you a curveball

2009-10-08T09:13:00.001-03:00

You know how you can have the best laid out plan, routines and a schedule, allowing you to feel confident and in control. And then something unexpected happens and turns your world upside down, causing you to totally loose your footing.

I’m a mother of two young sons. And as any parent would know that means I have become quite accustomed to having my everyday life disrupted every now and then. A visit to the doctor’s office for a sprained finger here, a day staying at home tending to a sick child there and not to mention the inevitable sick days of my own following what ever latest bug has followed my son’s home from school or day care.

I recognise that I am very privileged indeed to be my own boss and thus free to rearrange my work in true alignment with my children being my first priority. But that does not mean it doesn’t have consequences to do so.
My to do list grows, projects get delayed and I can get as overwhelmed and stressed as anybody else.

I am however a true believer in taking charge, rather than being a victim of circumstances. So I posed the question to myself: How can I stay balanced and make sure that what truly needs to be done gets done, and not lost in an overwhelming to do list, even when life throws me a curveball? Answer: A “special circumstances check list”.

It works something like this:

• When you find yourself in circumstances that severely disrupt your schedule and work plans, take a few minutes to consider which of your projects are of such nature that it will have severe consequences if they do not keep moving.
• Then consider what the minimum is you can do to keep them on target. That “minimum” goes on your “special circumstances check list” (or what ever you would like to call it).
• The rest you put out of your mind until you circumstances have “normalised”.
• And for the time that you are unable to follow your ordinary schedule or work plan, you limit yourself to doing only what is on that checklist (or even better ensure that someone does it for you), and for the rest of the time focus on what ever it is that has thrown you off track.

This will allow you to focus most of your energy on your special circumstances, whether it is some form of crisis you are facing or you just need to stay at home for a couple of days to recover from the flu.

Plans are good. But they are just that, plans. They can be altered or adjusted if needed, and most likely the world won’t go under if they do.
Allow yourself to be human. Allow yourself to sometimes have “special circumstances”. Empower yourself to catch the curveball.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

The 100 Day countdown for 2009 – Make the days count!

2009-09-24T08:39:00.003-03:00

Joining our choir of voices encouraging you to take full advantage of the 100 days left of the year 2009 is coach John Assaraf of www.OneCoach.com.

In his latest mailing he posed some questions for us to consider. I thought they were powerful and important and so I wanted to share them with you.

“… I have put together a number of questions for you to consider as you progress toward the finish line and call this year a wrap:
1. What specific results have you achieved so far this year?
2. Are you healthier, wealthier, and wiser?
3. Are you winning, losing or just holding ground?
4. What results are you committed to achieve by the end of the year?
5. How have you grown and what have you learned this year?
6. Is there any unfinished business that needs to be tended to in your life?
7. Are you actively pursuing what's most important on a daily basis?
8. What habits do you need to change to ensure better results?
9. What is the key issue that inhibits your ability to perform at your best?
You must live to answer and honor these questions, because when it comes to the last 100 days of the year, every day and everything you do counts.”
(John Assaraf www.OneCoach.com)

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

The 100 Day countdown for 2009 - part 1
The 100 Day countdown for 2009 - part 2
The 100 Day countdown for 2009 - part 3

The 100 Day countdown for 2009 - part 3

2009-09-23T08:37:00.001-03:00

Yesterday I encouraged you to stay in the mindset of already having fulfilled one aspect of your everyday life, that had significant meaning to you.
How was it? What was the dominant feeling of having that shift in your everyday life? How did it impact on other aspects of your life?
I hope this little exercise added to your motivation of getting into action to make it reality.

Today I want you to look at how that ideal scenario is different from where you are today. What would need to be different, what would need to change for it to become reality?
What of that can you influence or make happen? What can you stop doing? What can you do differently?

For a moment disregard any circumstances that you think stand in your way of transforming this to reality. Don’t give any thought to other people’s sayings or doings that you think block your way. But put all your focus on you.
Brainstorm and preferably write down the things that comes to mind about what you can do.

All changes start somewhere. What would be the tiniest, smallest first step?
Be specific.
Take that step today.

Okay. Congratulations. We have now got you into action. Small or big, it does not matter. They tiniest, smallest step you take brings you that bit closer to what you want, compared to where you were before. And now you are moving again.

The 100 day countdown for 2009 starts today.
Now I want you to take the different things you came up with around what you can do to change your everyday life, in that really important aspect that will have great impact on your life, and focus on at least one of them each day for 10 days, starting with that tiny, first step today.
I will check back with you later on to see how you are doing, and tell you about my own experience with this very same exercise.

Best of luck!

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

p.s. Comment below, or send an email to helena@eminentcoaching.com, and let us know what comes up for you with these exercises. Letting someone else know is one of the best ways to show yourself commitment. And commitment will help you keep going.

The 100 Day countdown for 2009 - part 1
The 100 Day countdown for 2009 - part 2

The 100 Day countdown for 2009 - part 2

2009-09-22T08:11:00.001-03:00

The other day I encouraged you to reflect on your dream vision for how you would like your everyday life to be. My suggestion was for you to write it down on a blank piece of paper.
Now I want you to look at what you have written down. Of all the things on that piece of paper, what excites you the most? What would have the most powerful impact on your everyday life if it was reality?

I’m not saying you can’t have everything on that list. I believe you can. You deserve to and I hope you will give yourself the chance to have it all.
To do that you need a starting point. And if you really want to set yourself up for success, focus.
That is why I want you to search your heart and your feelings for what it is on that list of yours that would mean the most to you. And then I want you to walk around the rest of the day and imagine that you are already there, that your life is already changed in this regard.
Don’t concern yourself with it feeling to far fetched or out of the realm of possibility.
For now, allow yourself to experience your life as if fully fulfilled in this one aspect that has significant meaning to you.

Enjoy, and check back soon for your next step towards living your life the way you want before the year is out.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

The 100 Day countdown for 2009 - Part 1

How Long to Form a Habit?

2009-09-21T12:07:00.002-03:00

Did you think it took somewhere between 21 and 28 days?
Sorry, that appears to be a myth. Or maybe it is congratulations, that is a myth.
It appears for some of us it can happen much faster, for others it does take a bit longer.

As with many things in life it actually varies from person to person.
I actually find that reassuring. It gives me a sense of it being something I can actually influence.

So are there any guidelines.
Well, why don't you read this article and decide for yourself?
How Long to Form a Habit?

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

The 100 Day countdown for 2009 - Part 1

2009-09-21T07:51:00.001-03:00

The 100 Day countdown for 2009 is fast approaching. On Wednesday the 23rd of September we have exactly 100 days left of the year 2009. That means 2/3 of the year has past by.
How much have you accomplished of the things you set out to do this year? How many of the changes you promised yourself have you realized? What is left for you to do in order to get to where you want to be?

I want to encourage you to take a moment, grab a pen and a blank piece of paper and empty out all your dreams, desires, hopes and wishes. (If you did something similar to this in the beginning of the year for instance, take a peak at what you felt was important then, but allow yourself to shift your priorities if you feel like it).
What would you really like your everyday life to be like? How much money do you want to have in your pocket? How much time do you want to spend with your family? Where do you want to be headed in your career?..
Write it all down.

We’ve got 100 days and more to go. Miracles have happened in less so there is no reason for you not to take some steps towards living life the way you want, before the year is out.

Let that piece of paper with your dream visions be a first step.
I will get back to you with some ideas and tips on what you can do with that information.

Get started!

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Give yourself a carrot

2009-09-15T11:34:00.002-03:00

Do you have a project you need, or should, work through, but for some reason or another cannot muster they energy to get going.
Do you keep making up excuses for yourself to go and do other things instead?

Perhaps the project is tedious and boring or perhaps you just don’t see any meaning or point to it.
Well, remember when you were a child and how your parents got you to do things which you didn’t want to do by offering you a reward once you had it done?
You can apply that same principle to yourself also today.

Give yourself some motivation.
Tangle a carrot of your choosing in front of you. When I have completed this I will reward myself with….

Give yourself encouragement along the way.
If I work on this for an hour today I while treat myself to … at lunch.

Give yourself a view of freedom from this project.
Estimate how long it is going to take you to complete. Start a countdown stating how many hours work is done and how many hours of work remains until it is completed.

What is your favourite way of motivating yourself? Post it in comment or send me an e-mail: helena@eminentcoaching.com.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Refocus and celebrate everyday life

2009-08-25T05:21:00.002-03:00

I participated in a teleclass on the wonderful subject of CELEBRATION the other day. Not just in the sense of Birthday celebrations, Independence days or graduations and the like. But also in terms of focusing on things to be grateful for and enjoying everyday life.

Friends and family of mine often hear me advocating for “taking every opportunity to celebrate”. That is because I believe in focusing on the enjoyments of life.

When we can take notice of the positive things around us, small and simple as well as more significant and impressive, the potential annoyances and challenges we face seem to be easier to handle.
And that is how life can be, easy and smooth and enjoyable. If we can just allow ourselves to pause long enough in our busy, hectic everyday lives, to take notice of all the things there are to smile about.

Not finding it so easy? Perhaps these examples of refocusing can inspire you.

Are your kids “driving you up the wall”? Refocus, and think about how it feels to hear your children’s laughter, how privileged you are to actually have them in your life (you really couldn’t imagine life without them, could you?) and how much you learn from them.

Are you feeling stressed out at work? Refocus, and think about why you applied for this job in the first place, why you have chosen to stay there and what you actually like about it.

Can’t think of anything to smile about? Refocus, and ask someone else what they are currently feeling happy about. Ask them what they would be happy about if they were in your shoes.

Being back from summer season I now have a lot of projects demanding my attention, heaps of laundry waiting, and some schedule challenges to work out with my children at different child care providers. However I am focusing on the smile on my oldest son’s face as he talks about all the new friends he has made, on the comforts of being back home in our own house and on my feelings of inspiration and excitement for the new services I have to offer my clients.
And with the positive energy that gives me the projects become easier to break down into action steps. I do bits of laundry at a time allowing it to take some more time to complete. And I focus on feeling really privileged to be able to schedule my own working hours.

So what are you grateful for at this point in time? What do you celebrate in your everyday life?

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Carrie’s got it!

2009-08-04T08:15:00.002-03:00

She’s got it!

• She is aware of your busy schedule.
• She understands you need to keep learning to keep developing.
• She knows how inspiration from others can empower you.
• She has found a way to put it all together.

Come and join the Women’s Wildfire Rally 2009!

24 women, in 15 minutes each, during 6 teleintervjues/webinars, inspire you with their stories of Taking Charge of Life, Income and Future.

It is FREE!
It is on-line or over the phone!
And You are invited!

Watch Carrie’s information video here and get signed up.

To Your Success in life,

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Retreat to recharge

2009-08-03T06:09:00.001-03:00

I have just spent a few days away at our family’s country home. Being back home and feeling recharged has reminded me of how beneficial it can be to allow yourself a retreat now and then.

To have a retreat out in the archipelago (you have to go by boat to get to ours) with its fabulous geographical scenery, the ocean and the silence, is of course a privilege.
A retreat need not be so spectacular though to still offer great benefit. It is more about getting away from the hustle and buzzes of everyday life, away from the reminders in your home of chores that need doing, away from all the people asking for your attention, away from the demands of work and study. Away, to a place where your mind can rest and your body relax.

Going away for a while, to a place that offers a peaceful environment that totally differs from where you normally spend your days, allows you to recharge. When recharged you can both enjoy the small comforts of modern western living, as well as better handle potential annoyances from the demands of modern everyday life.

So why not schedule in some time for a personal retreat not to far into the future, and prevent yourself from becoming depleted as a new busy season soon begins?

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Where do you “retreat” to? Why there?

New perspectives on failures

2009-07-27T09:36:00.003-03:00

Most of us have things in life that we have started but never finished. Things we would like to do, but so far have not dared. Things we have tried but where we have not attained the result we were after and therefore feel we have failed.
Sometimes we can feel all weighed down when we think of all these unfinished projects, all the things we haven’t done and all we have failed to succeed with.
But you can turn all these energy draining thought patterns into empowering energy.

Think about the classic story of how Thomas Edison experimented to find out how to succeed with the light bulb. It is said that he tried a thousand times before succeeding. He himself did not consider these attempts to be failures though. He just saw them as learning experiences that taught him yet other ways in which what he wanted to do would not work.

Another more modern example is 3M who formulated a new glue, but which would not dry. It is said that the “failed” glue was passed to a secretary at 3M in case he/she could find some use for it. And boy did he/she find use for it. The Post-It™ Notes are today one of 3Ms best selling products and well known to us all.

All our life experiences can be viewed from different perspectives. Which perspective we choose can either hold us back and block us or open new paths and possibilities.

So next time you feel weighed down by failures, consider the following exercise:•
• Choose one of the negative thoughts that are on your mind
• Write it down in the following manner: To fail ________________ (fill in what you were thinking about) does not mean that I _______________ (fill in what you thought about yourself as a result of what you had not accomplished).
• Try to look for something positive with that experience, or a way that you can use that experience for something positive.
• Write that down in a following sentence starting with “It means ______________ (fill in the positive things that came to mind).

Allow yourself to be inspired by the following post to the Swedish M-magazine No 9, 2009 from the signature Gun-Mari (English translation by me):
“It is not dangerous to fail..
To fail does not mean that I am a failure. It means I have not yet succeeded.
To fail does not mean that I have not accomplished anything. It means I have learned something.
To fail does not mean that I have been a fool. It means I have enough faith to try.
To fail does not mean that I have embarrassed myself. It means I have had the guts to try.
To fail does not mean that I haven’t done it. It means I have done something differently.
To fail does not mean that I am inferior. It means I am not totally perfect.
To fail does not mean that I have wasted my life. It means that I have a reason for starting all over.
To fail does not mean I should give up. It means that I ought to try again.
To fail does not mean that I will never be able to do it. It means I need more practise.
So never give up, it is from the failures we learn.”

What can you say? How about ”more failures, please!”

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Live life's Great Adventure through music

2009-07-21T01:00:00.001-03:00

Music can be a great source of inspiration for most of us. Personally I find it especially inspireing when I find artists who go outside the traditional boundaries and deliver a true musical experience at the same time.

One of my favourites is Lucinda Drayton/Bliss. I was first introduced to her music through the incredibly beautiful "One hundred thousand angels".

Now Blissful Records announses the release of a new website: www.lucindadrayton.com.
I do recommend you to stop by there. Samples of her music is of course playing at the site and a shop for purchising her music, either as downloadable mp3 track by track or as complete CDs, is included as well as other resources.
You can download one of her latest tracks for free - "Great Adventure" från "Different Drum" - a little more up beat, full of energy and something I think might appeal also to a younger teenage audience.
I like to play it before I am to try out something new, go meet new people, talk before an audience or things like that.

Some other examples of Lucinda Dratyon/Bliss music can be found in the play list below, including "One hundred thousand angels".

Enjoy.

Do you have any favourite artists who inspire with their music and by going outside of the traditional boundaries? Leave a comment or email me at: helena@eminentcoaching.com and let us hear about it.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

What do you see when looking with new eyes?

2009-07-17T07:39:00.001-03:00

One of the most important tasks for a coach is to help you look at your life and the world around you with new eyes and/or from new angles.
The purpose of this is for you to gain awareness of how you are looking at your life, yourself or perhaps your business, at present, and consider if there could be another way that could serve you better.

The benefit of this is for you to open your mind to new options and alternatives that you might not otherwise come to think of, for finding solutions to the challenges you face or solving the problems you are dealing with.

As we go through life we all adopt beliefs, thought patterns and sometimes habits that, without us being aware of it, tend to steer us in certain directions. Our friends and family all relate to us from a certain perspective; father to son, subordinate to boss, wife to husband etc. And this in turn means that they tend to see what you face and deal with in your life, funnelled through that perspective, and advice you accordingly.

That is why professional coaching can have such an empowering impact on your life. As someone who, ideally, does not know you personally a coach is able to look at what you tell him/her about your life, or business, much more objectively. Not to give you advice or tell you what to do.
But so he/she can ask you those questions that will “turn on your light bulb”, make you go “Ahaa!” and spin your challenges around so you can view them not only the way you have been taught to, made it a habit to or thought you should, but from every other direction you can come to think of.
Imagine all the new options you will then be able to see and have at your disposal to consider!

And even better, in many cases you can accomplish this all by yourself.
You can ask yourself questions can’t you?

“What if it was my best friend in this situation? What advice would I give him/her?”
“I really admire X. He would find a way around this obstacle. So, what would he do?”
“Because I am the supplier I look at it this way. How would I look at it if I was the customer? The manufacturer? The sharehoulder? The transporter?...”
“How do I get my teenager to listen to me? What does he/she hear from his/her perspective? Would I want to listen if I were him/her? What would make me want to listen if I were him/her?”

So go and explore. What new perspectives can you find on the challenges that are hindering you from living your life the way You want? What new options does that give you?

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Brighten someone’s day

2009-07-13T08:49:00.004-03:00

Remember that warm feeling in your heart when someone you haven’t been in touch with for a while phones you up? Or how you can spend time reading a letter over and over again from a dear friend.

Being remembered and appreciated holds great value to each and every one of us. When was the last time you wrote your grandmother or sent a “Hang in there” card to someone facing challenges?
Imagine if someone was to walk up to you with fresh flowers just to say “I really appreciate you” or sent you a photo to show that they remember a special day you spent together.

Today there are numerous ways of staying in touch, regardless of time of day or location in the world. All of us have the power to spread some light in our own as well as each others lives, by sending a little message to one another now and then.

I’m going to surprise a cousin of mine by sending an e-card. Just thinking about it puts a smile on my own face.

Who’s day are you going to brighten and how?
Leave a comment or send me an email (helena@eminentcoaching.com) and let us know.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Guiding youth in the 21st century

2009-07-08T05:10:00.000-03:00

Young people growing up today will be living in a society that in many ways will have changed more or less dramatically from the one we, their parent’s and grandparent’s generations, grew up in.

The youngsters themselves do not perceive society to be in the midst of change to the degree we do. They do not have life experience enough to see it in that perspective, which might actually be a good thing since they do not experience the fears and concerns we might do.

It is we, as parents and grandparents, teachers and counsellors, who can feel challenged.
How do I prepare my child for this world that appears so different to me from when I grew up?
Who am I to give advice when I myself feel confused and overwhelmed?

Perhaps the answers lay with the youngsters themselves.
If we embrace their commitment to contribute to the world and do something “that matters”, then we can teach them about the difference between material riches and the wealth of love and compassion.
If we support their quest to choose careers that allow them to work with their life passions, then we can share our reflections on the choices we might have made had we followed more of our hearts rather than tradition, custom and that which we thought would bring security.
If we open our minds to them calling the whole world their home, then we can tell them about our acquired knowledge of the importance to care for mother earth.

If we look into the world from the self confident and curious perspective of our youngsters, then maybe we will see that preparing them for life’s challenges is not all that different today, even though we may perceive the world they will live in to have changed from yesterday.

What are your “words of wisdom” for they young people growing up in this modern world?
Comment below or send me an e-mail (helena@eminentcoaching.com) and let us know.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Are you keeping in touch?

2009-07-03T06:02:00.002-03:00

My brother and sister in law, with kids, are coming home to Sweden for summer vacation. I’m really looking forward to sitting down at a dinner table with them, talking with them face to face and being able to show that they are important to me by actually giving each one of them a big hug.

Modern technology has really shrunk the world. I can pick up the phone and talk to my sister in law just as if she was next door, even when she’s home in Vietnam. I can chat with my brother over the internet when he spends some time waiting for a flight out of Hanoi. And I can text my mother on my mobile to confirm our meeting point in town.

Today we have access to all these wonderful tools for communicating, regardless of time zones and geographic locations.
But as I enjoy the thought of soon being able to see my brother and his family “up close and personal”, I also realize that we haven’t kept in touch nearly as much as we could have and that I would have liked, since they were last here.

Does this sound familiar also to you? Do you place great value on staying connected to friends and family only to, some how, have the actual actions to do it get lost in your busy everyday life?
Well you know there is something really great about this. It is fully within our own power to immediately improve upon!

Some suggested steps:
1) Reflect on how often you would really like to communicate with each family member or friend.

2) Where possible and appropriate, agree with the other party on when and how to communicate and schedule it in regularly! (Remember most of us are challenged with busy lives, but most of us also put high priority on friendships and family ties).

3) For those with which it is a matter of one-way communication, at a time anyway, put reminders in place. Or reserve a time slot know and then, perhaps with a check list for who and how you want to work on keeping in touch.

4) Decide on what next step you can take, right now, in order to take charge of improving upon staying in touch with friends and family.

Personally I am going to pick up the phone and welcome my brother home to Sweden for the summer and then I am going to write a long over due letter to my grandmother. How about you?

How do you ensure that taking action to keep in touch with your loved ones stays part of your every day life? Leave a comment.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Now it is finally here, vacation time.

2009-07-01T06:18:00.002-03:00

It feels like you have been waiting for ever, planning all the things you are going to do and all the people you are going to catch up with. Really had something to look forward to as a reward for all the stress and hard work.
And now it is finally time. You have a nice long morning in bed. Set yourself a nice breakfast tray och seat yourself out on the terrace.
And then it strikes. The fatique. The mere thought of getting up to fetch a glas of water feels overwhelming. How on earth are you going to realize all your plans..?

Does it sound familiar? Are you also seated on a deck chair with an overwhelming need to just be left alone and rest? Then you are not alone.

For many of us everyday life is stressful, full of projects, tight schedules and professional demands. And for some with depressingly dark, cold and uncomfortable weathering during large parts of the year (I have my homebase in the Nordic country of Sweden remember). Summer vacation becomes the light in the end of the tunnel for many of us. The reward that awaits on the other side of the finishing line and gives us that extra perseverance and energy to find the strength to push through until we reach that vacation time.

The only problem is that as our professional lives demand so much of our time in our everyday lives, we tend to create a long list of projects that just have to wait until we get som vacation time.
On top of that, when we fantasize and plan for how fabulous our vacation reward is going to be it often involves travelling, visiting relatives, children on school holiday who need to be activated and that we are finally going to learn French.

If you find yourself sitting there in your deck chair exhausted, it is time to reprioritize!

Start by treating yourself to a few days of doing absolutely nothing. And for every following vacation day that you are of with acitivities or excursions, why not plan for one day of rest and recovery.

If it is sunny and hot – take a siesta during the day

If relatives are coming for dinner why not make it a Dutch treat and serve on paper plates and in plastic cups.

What other little things can you come to think of, to simplify your day allowing for some more rest and relaxation?
Comment or send me an e-mail and let us know (helena@eminentcoaching.com)

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Summer – relaxation or challenge?

2009-06-04T06:12:00.004-03:00

The summer season has started here in Sweden. Yes, I know it might be raining outside the window and the temperatures may not be as high as vi would like. But anyway. It is June, and here in Sweden the days are long and bright. And most people have a smile on their face when they talk about the upcoming months. But, as with most things in life, the summer season comes with it’s own challenges.

Privately we may be joggling activities for schoolchildren on summer break, our visiting mother in law, some time in the hammock, renovation of the summer house and a few weeks out on the boat would be nice too.
Amongst my clients who run smaller service businesses, like salons and nail studios, there are sighs of resignation as they see business slowing down considerably as their clients are expected to leave their every day lives behind them in favour of summer, sun and bathing.

As with everything in life it is actually we who choose what our summer is going to be like. We can either enjoy the positive change from our every day life, talk with our loved ones about what we want and do not want and then make a plan to have our best summer ever.
Or we can let ourselves be overwhelmed and stressed by demands, ”shoulds” and trying to please just about everybody, as well as spending hours in the salon/studio just to make sure we do not miss a potential client that might pass by and need a repair, or alternatively just give up and close up shop for a couple of months (do you belong to, or know of someone who belongs to, this group of service providers get in touch and let me tell you about the SUMMER POWER program I’ve set up for beauty therapists and nail designers).

If you feel a tendency to fall into the latter, it is about time you ”pulled yourself up” (and/or asked someone to help pull you up) in order to refocus so you as well get to enjoy this summer season. You deserve to!

Reflect on the following questions:
What is your greatest challenge with the summer season?
What would be your “dream solutions”?
What needs to change/be different from previous summers, in order to realize that solution?
What can You do to achieve the change that is needed?
What first step can you take today towards that change?

Are you finding it hard to come up with answers, or does your answers feel like blind alleys? Get some assistance!
Talk to a friend or exchange ideas with others in simular circumstances to you. Today there are also a lot of us coaches around who can help you find and realize the solutions that suit you.

Take matters into your own hands and do what You can for this to be your best summer season ever!

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

If you want to enjoy the upcoming season Your way, in alignment with what is important to You and on Your terms – then get in touch to book Your Free ”Taking Charge” coaching session! On my webpage you can find more information and how to get in touch: www.eminentcoaching.com

If you are a beauty therapist and/or run a salon/nail studio I have a special coaching program called SUMMER POWER, designed to keep your business up and running also during what could otherwise be a “slow” time of year. Send me an e-mail with SUMMER POWER in the subject line, and I will get back to you with more information: info@eminentcoaching.com

Having the cake and eating it

2009-05-19T06:32:00.003-03:00

Having the cake and eating it used to be my life philosophy. I still believe it is everyone’s right, if one so chooses or want to.

Personally I just didn’t count on the fact that you might need to ask for some help here and there to actually pull it off, at least when you have two small children, two dogs and run a growing business. (I am really lousy at asking for help).
I tried to compose the recipe, prepare, bake, serve, decorate and eat the cake myself.
Guess what happened? I burned out.

But don’t worry. Remember I am all about “living life Your way”.
If you are a parent and running a business I have some good news for you.
There is nothing wrong with both having the cake and eating it. It is fully possible!

There are actually several people who have mastered this (or are aiming to). One of them is Fabienne Fredrickson. Recently she spoke at a Savvy Mompreneur Telesummit. And you can learn what she had to say about the techniques she uses to run a successful business and family life here.

For myself. Well;
1) I am still the privileged mother of 2 pre school children
2) I asked my parents to help with one of the dogs
3) I am still running a growing business, though a different one
4) and I am finding my way of living life the way I want, in a healthy manner ;-)
(It was actually my own journey back to healthy living, and a desire to share the tools I found along the way with others, that brought me to coaching. But that is a story for another time).

Personally I have a different life motto today that serves me better. But in my opinion there is nothing wrong with both having the cake and eating it.
If you want it – go for it!
Just watch out so you don’t let “having it all” equal “doing it all”, at least by yourself.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Mini breaks – use your memories to combat stress and overwhelm

2009-05-13T05:35:00.002-03:00

You know how you can sometimes loose yourself in a memory or thinking about something that made you smile the other day. Your eyes seem to gaze at something far off in the distance and you are only barely aware of what is going on around you. A little bit like day dreaming, but instead of indulging in a fantasy you enjoy the recollection of a pleasurable experience.
You may remember smells, sights, and people and recollect how wonderful you felt and how much you enjoyed it.

I think little mind retreats like that can be extremely powerful and a great way to combat stress or overwhelm. A way of taking a mini break if you will.
And I think it can be a great way of making use of that nice vacation or enjoying that fond memory over and over again.

With today’s technology there are new exiting ways we can empower ourselves to easily transport ourselves off on such little mini breaks.
One of my personal favourites is slide shows on my computer.

I take my digital camera with me just about every where I go, so I can always attempt to capture those special moments in a photo. It’s then quite easy to upload them into a slide show, maybe adding some music or some comments to enhance the recollection of the moods and feelings at the time. There are several applications available that can assist you with this, making it quick and easy. One I like to use is Smilebox (www.smilebox.com).

Anyway, whenever I start to feel stressed and long for some peace and quiet, or perhaps bogged down with working longing for time with my family, I just open a file on my computer and off I go for a couple of minutes.
More often than not I come back with a smile on my face, a much more positive attitude and renewed energy.

What is your favourite way of taking a mini break?

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

The power of taking a break

2009-05-05T05:33:00.004-03:00

We all know that to stay healthy and feel good we need a healthy balance in our lives. We need to mix work and play, sound and silence, activity and relaxation.

This past weekend I was reminded of the importance of now and then taking a break from our everyday lives.

I am a working mother with two wonderful preschool sons. I live with my life partner and children in a house in a suburb to the city of Stockholm. And just as for so many of us this means I have a lot on my plate.
To juggle all my different chores and activities I try to set up routines and create supporting habits. Still there is always something that needs doing, around the house or with work. And as long as I am going about my daily business or leading my everyday life at my home I am reminded of all these things a want and usually need to do, just by the mere fact of seeing it in the environment around me.

Well, this past weekend we did something different. We visited my parents at their holiday home out in the Stockholm archipelago. Since it involves a car drive and about one hour’s boat ride to and from the island where they are situated, it becomes a full day’s excursion.
I guess you could say we took a day off from our everyday lives and did something totally different. Not just because of the time transporting ourselves to and from my parent’s place, but because of the total change of both scenery and environment.

Instead of rooms full of toys and computer games my sons got to create with hammers, nails, wood and their own imagination. Instead of riding bikes or walking on concrete walkways the whole family got to stroll in the woods and climb cliffs. Instead of the constant background noise of the busy traffic we could really hear the singing birds and enjoy the sounds of the ocean. Instead of trying to catch some warmth from the sun through glass windows we could relax on a warm sandy beach.

I got a full day of enjoying time with my family and not once, not a single time, did I give any thought to the piles of laundry or what to prepare for dinner.
I came home with a totally different state of mind, calmer and more at peace. And so I could go back to my everyday life with more focus and renewed energy.

Lesson learned
When you feel that there just isn’t enough time, or that you cannot take time off for play and fun because you need or should do this and that first, then it is actually a very good time to take a real break.

My suggestion
Give yourself a set period of time. It does not have to be a full day, but at least an hour or so.
Give yourself permission to, for this set period of time, let go of all you feel you should and/or ought to do.
Get yourself away from your everyday surroundings with the dirty dishes or stacks of paper on your desk.
And for this period of time ban all thoughts of things waiting to be done and free your whole mind, body and soul to just relax, be, enjoy and experience.

In short, give yourself a break!

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Have you noticed the shift?

2009-04-29T09:57:00.000-03:00

Amidst all the negative reporting still surrounding us I’ve noticed two interesting and uplifting trends.

1) More and more people are tired of all the doom and gloom and are choosing not to listen anymore, not to read the papers or not to listen to the news.
More and more people are consciously choosing to look for the positive, for what makes them feel good and for that which brings them joy.

2) There are a few of those who are currently loosing their jobs in the wake of the turbulent financial circumstances around us, who choose to look upon it as an opportunity. These people actually have little trouble in finding new jobs, business ventures, career shifts or change of directions in life towards something more fulfilling.

What if you were to do the same?

Imagine taking a break from listening to the news or reading the newspapers, and focusing on things that made you feel good about yourself and about life. How would you feel?

What if you were to face the challenges that you are experiencing as opportunities to look for alternatives, experience something different, change towards something better…? What would happen to your outlook on life?

/Helena
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

"Don’t talk to me about the difficulties, talk to me about the opportunities!”

Taking the discomfort out of decision making

2009-04-29T07:39:00.000-03:00

Another reason we fear making a decision is when we are uncomfortable with the consequences that follow with a certain decision. Putting that in the context of the analogy of decision making as travel planning (se previous blog posts on decision making), there might be aspects of some ways of travelling that we would rather avoid.

Let me give you an example from my personal experience.

When I was pregnant I felt uncomfortable being confined to a plane, unable to stop and get out for a while if I felt the need to. But I had a meeting in another country that I wanted to attend. Normally I would take a flight but during the circumstances I did not feel that it was an option at that time. So there I was with what initially appeared to be a hard decision to make.

Flying to the meeting – could be considered the wrong decision because I was uncomfortable flying at that time, but could also be considered the right decision because I wanted to attend the meeting
Not going to the meeting – could be considered the right decision because I was uncomfortable flying at that time, but could also be considered the wrong decision because I did want to attend the meeting

But then I opened my mind to the notion that there was not a wrong or a right decision, only options to choose from. I also recognised that at that point in my life considering transporting myself to that meeting by any means that did not allow me the possibility to stop and step out if I wanted to, made me feel very uncomfortable.
The question then became: What alternatives remained in order for me to get the information presented at the meeting (my destination), without feeling uncomfortable getting there?
- by boat? No, same consequence as flying (would not be able to stop and get off when I felt a need to)
- by car? Yes. That would be an alternative. It would take me longer to get to the meeting, but I would be able to stop and get out when ever I wanted.
- Sending someone else to the meeting? Yes. That would also be an alternative. It would take me longer to get the information presented at the meeting, but I would not have to face any discomfort with aspects of travelling.

Initially I was limited to making a hard decision between either a style of travelling to my destination that I was uncomfortable with or not reaching my destination at all. But by changing my perspective and not considering there to be a right or wrong answer, I instead found myself in the much more relaxed position of having two viable alternatives to choose between.

Take the example from my previous blogposts on decision making and imagine you want more time with your children (the destination) ,which of course can not be considered wrong, and let us add the very probable notion that doing it in a way that would decrease income would be uncomfortable at this point in time.
Destination: more time with children
Preferred travel comfort: no loss of income
Alternatives for means of travel:
1) quit working all together
2) go from full time to part time
3) partially working from home
4) spreading vacation time over days of work here and there during the year

If you are to avoid the undesirable effect of loss of income alternatives 1) and 2) are not suitable at this time, but you have two other viable alternatives to choose from.
(But then again if option 2) feels the most appealing there is the alternative of postponing the trip in order to travel in the style desired… )

RECAP
When you find yourself having a hard time making a decision:
1) hold the notion that there is no wrong or right answer
2) get clear on your destination, i.e. what you want the end result to be from your decision
3) look for other alternatives than the obvious options that you are initially trying to decide between
4) are there any aspects of how you get to your desired end result that would make you feel uncomfortable
5) eliminate the alternatives that brings about those feeling of discomfort
6) choose the one of the remaining options that suits you best at this point in time

Relax – consider alternatives – make a choice!

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Taking the uncertainty out of decision making

2009-04-27T11:06:00.001-03:00

One of the reasons we fear making a decision, or that the decision we make might be the wrong one, are when we are uncertain of the outcome.
So if you can take the uncertainty out of the decision making, the process can become much easier.

The other day I compared decision making to travel planning.
Let’s say you are considering quitting your current job. Pondering over such a decision can lead to a lot of frustration and worry if you do not know what the outcome of it will be.
Therefore it can be a good idea to start with the outcome.

Ask yourself why you are considering quitting your job?
What is it you want to achieve by quitting, that you do not experience now?
For illustrative purposes let’s say your reason is that you want more time with your children. So “more time with your children” is your destination.

No one will blame a parent for wanting more time with their children, so holding on to the notion that there is no right or wrong decision, only options to choose from, is not hard in this case.

Quitting your job would then be one option. Not working would obviously take you straight to your destination as you could spend the hours you used to work with your children. A bit like taking a sky rocket to your destination, but it would most probably come with some other consequences as well (sky rocketing is expensive for one thing) so you are hesitating to make that decision.
What are other alternatives or optional routes to your destination?
How about
- going from full time to part time
- doing some of your work from home (after your children’s bedtime for instance)
- spreading your vacation time out as one day off work here and there rather than several weeks in a row

All of the above will get you to your destination. Now you just have to choose which option is the most suitable for you at this point in time.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Taking the fear out of decision making - no wrong or right

Taking the fear out of decision making - no wrong or right

2009-04-26T10:29:00.003-03:00

When there is turbulence around us, staying secure and playing it safe are high on our priority lists. And I think we all agree that it is turbulent around us right now.
Even people who normally are the dare devils that throw themselves out into the unknown with a “you wont know until you try” mentality are now hesitating. Many of us have become paralysed with fear of making the wrong decision.

My suggestion for approaching this dilemma is to let go of the notion that there is a wrong or right decision and look upon the different decisions as options or alternatives.

You can compare it to travelling.
You have a destination you want to reach. Now you just have to choose whether to travel by car, plane or boat. They will all get you to your destination so none of them are wrong. It’s just that it will vary how fast you get there, how straight your journey will be and what stops you can do along the way.
Looking at it that way you might also realise that you can get there by means of walking, biking, motorcycle riding or flying an air balloon.

If you are clear about your destination and open to that there are a number of ways to get you there, you are free to choose the type of journey that will suit you best at this point in time.
And making the decision only becomes choosing one option out of various alternatives.

Happy decision making.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

The power of Sound of Music in modern everyday life

2009-04-23T08:12:00.003-03:00

Pause for a few minutes and come away smiling for the rest of the day.

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Be yourself

2009-04-15T06:24:00.006-03:00

By now you know I want to inspire you to live Your life the way You want.
Part of that is of course to know your authentic self and living your life as yourself, the way You want to be.

Not the way your parents think you should be, not the way your friends are, not the way so called experts say is the "right" way to be - but the way you feel, in your heart, is the way for you to be.

Best selling author Mike Robbins hase now released a new book (Be Yourself, Everyone Else is Already Taken: Transform Your Life with the Power of Authenticity) to inspire, assist and support us in being just who we are ment to be and love life as being ourselves.

I am so looking forward to reading it and thought you might to.

/Helena
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

An illustration of pursuing dreams

2009-04-14T07:20:00.000-03:00

Bring out your dreams, dust them of, put them in a place of honour and let them come to life – your life!

Most of us are familiar with expressions like:

“Don’t judge a book by it’s cover”
“It’s never to late..”
“Nothing risked, nothing gained”
“Dare, to win”

Never have I seen this so well illustrated as in this video clip from the auditions for “Britains Got Talent 2009”.

Watch it! Enjoy it. Be inspired by it.
Then hold your head high, go out and take the next step in pursuing Your dream!

/Helena
“Live life Your way”
www.eminentcoaching.com

Step 3 for a Positive Attitude = Smile

2009-04-08T08:04:00.001-03:00

When you wake up in the morning and meet that un groomed person in the bathroom mirror, greet yourself with a smile.
Today is a new day and you just gave it a good start.
Why not make the conscious decision to greet whoever you meet during the day with a smile?

I am sure you have heard and experienced how contagious smiling is and how it really oozes positivity.
For instance, have you noticed how hard it is to stay mad at someone who keeps smiling at you?

And have you noticed how smiling can work as a magic shield against negativity. If you keep smiling also when you hear bad news, or respond to critique with a smile and a “thank you for that feedback”, it is almost like it bounces of from you. It just doesn’t become that big of a deal. And so you stay more positive and life feels a little bit easier.

Do you have someone around you who haven’t smiled for a long time or who never seems to? Challenge yourself to smile at that person every time you meet him/her for say 5 days, and see what happens. And do let me know.

To smiling faces and a positive attitude.
/Helena
“Live life Your way”
www.eminentcoaching.com

A smile confuses an approaching frown. (Author Unknown)

Step 1 for a Positive Attitude
Step 2 for a Positive Attitude

Step 2 for a Positive Attitude = Appreciation

2009-04-07T08:07:00.002-03:00

Appreciation is really an extension of step 1 - Gratitude.
When ever you want to stop yourself from getting caught up in noticing only how things are not what you think, or wish, that they should be – you can play an Appreciation Game.
It will put your focus on enjoying life and promote a positive attitude.
There are a number of ways to play it. Here are a few suggestions:

1) Around the family kitchen table (a personal favourite of mine when my kids appear to have forgotten all about brotherly love).
- You just go around the table and in turn each family member gets to say something positive about another family member. Something they think that family member is good at, or something nice they think they have done, or a reason why they love them (if you have teenagers you might consider using wording like “appreciate them for” instead), or something they think they have done well.

2) With regard to your life partner/spouse
a) You know those times when you have, temporarily, forgotten why on earth you decided to share your life with the man/woman and just feel like spitting and cursing over their uselessness or what an idiot he/she is.
- Take a couple of deep breaths and recite to yourself at least 3 things that you appreciate about your partner (yey, this is another favourite of mine)
b) When you want to reconnect with your partner and perhaps close some distance that has formed between the two of you.- Choose a time of day when you have the best odds of your partner actually listening to you. Then tell him/her something you appreciate and/or love about them. Then ask them to respond with something they appreciate and/or love about you. Continue with something else that you appreciate about them and allow for him/her to respond. And so on..
(By the way, this one is not my own idea, it is actually inspired by Chris Attwood’s and Janet Bray Attwood’s version of the Appreciation Game from their book the Passion Test).

3) When you are “out and about” and want to see all the beauty in the world (as opposed to noticing all that is wrong with the world).
- Reflect on what you are noticing around you. What do you find pleasurable about it? If you initially do not find something pleasurable about it, try to think of something about it that is actually positive. Look at it from another perspective, think of how in some way it is useful or beneficial to something or someone.

Do you have suggestions for other ways to play the Appreciation Game?

To a positive attitude and enjoying life.
/Helena
“Live life Your way”
www.eminentcoaching.com

Step 1 for a Positive Attitude = Gratitude

Positivity Week – staying in the mood

2009-03-30T15:29:00.004-03:00

The seven days of ICAs (International Coach Academy) proclaimed Positivity Week have passed. Numerous comments at the teleclasses and postings on various forums give witness to what a positive experience many of us found it to be. I think someone even suggested making a daily teleclass to replace the 6 o’clock news.

Apparently we were many who welcomed this approach to counter acting all the negative messages we are facing on a daily basis. This focus on positivity gave us a more hopeful attitude, easier weight on our shoulders, a brighter outlook on life and more energy.

The ICA teleclasses focusing on positivity are over, at least for the time being, but the negative reporting around us is not unfortunately.
So how can we keep ourselves in this positive mood?

Well, here is my 1st suggested step:

Step 1 for a Positive Attitude = Gratitude

I am sure you have heard it before, but it is worth mentioning again, and practising.
List a few things everyday, that you are grateful for. Things that you have or that you have experienced during the day. Things that make your life easier, comfortable, worth living. Things that you would be happy to experience again, do or have more of. Things that make you feel grateful.
List them in full sentence statements. For instance, today I will list;

“I am grateful to have such a supporting relationship with my mother”
“I am grateful that my loving lifepartner is also such a wonderful father”
“I am grateful that I get to work with my passion for inspiring people to live their lives on their own terms”.

Give your statements out loud or quietly to yourself, witch ever you prefer.
Write your statements in a Gratitude Journal if you want. Reading through past statements is sure to bring a smile to your face. And it is hard not to feel positive when smiling.
Repeat statements from other days if you want. That will enforce their positive power by turning them into affirmations.
But always try to add something new as well.

With gratitude,
Helena
“Live life Your way”
www.eminentcoaching.com

“A positive attitude is something everyone can work on, and everyone can learn how to employ it.“ (Joan Lunden)

Positivity Week Day 1
Positivity Week Day 3
Positivity Week Day 4
Positivity Week Day 5

Positivity Week Day 5

2009-03-27T16:57:00.002-03:00

Today I count my blessings!

Outside my window the snow is once again proclaiming winter with stormy winds and chilling tempretures..
..but I am blessed to have a comfortable warm house in which to huddle up with my family.

With the chillier temperatures and unstable weather my body aches in protest....but I am blessed to choose my own working hours and working pace.

My children are tired and gloomy after the long dark winter months..
..but I am blessed to spend time with them every day and be there to wipe their runny noses.

Today, and each day, I count my blessings.
Today, and each day, there are things to be grateful for.
Today, and each day, when I think of the positives in my life it far outweighs the negatives.

Have you counted your blessings today?

/Helena
“Live life Your way”
www.eminentcoaching.com

Positivity Week Day 1 Positivity Week Day 3
Positivity Week Day 4

Positivity Week Day 4

2009-03-26T13:15:00.002-03:00

"By doing something positive in this world, you're helping people and the future. We're all trying to help the world... make it a better place to live. We're actually still changing the world, aren't we?" (Rick Danko)

This week I am supporting International Coach Academy's initiative to spread as much positivity around the world as possible, in an effort to counter-act all the negative messages that we are being exposed to at this time.
Today I am doing it by sharing some quotes on positivity with you.

"A strong positive attitude will create more miracles than any wonder drug." (Patricia Neal)

"Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you'll start having positive results." (Willie Nelson)

"Choosing to be positive and having a grateful attitude is going to determine how you're going to live your life."
(Joel Osteen)

Do you have a positivity quote of your own to share?

/Helena
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Positivity Week Day 1
Positivity Week Day 3

Positivity Week Day 3

2009-03-25T13:00:00.001-03:00

In support of International Coach Academy’s declaration of this as Positivity Week, let me today share an exercise from today’s teleclass on Positivity.

Take the word POSITIVE and, letter by letter, see what words you can come up with that has a positive ring to it. Below are some of the words we came up with in class:

P – possibility, powerful, perspectives, people
O – optimism, opportunity, optimizing, openness
S – support, simplicity, success, strategy
I – inspiration, invention, interest
T – trust, terrific, talent, testimonial, trustworthiness
I – innovate, increase, integration
V – victory, velocity, variable, vigilant, vibrant
E – evolution, expectation, energy, exceptional, empathy, emotion, elation, enthusiasm

We spent about 10 minutes on this exercise and we all agreed that we came out feeling energized and, of course, positive.

What other positive associations can you come up with to the letters in the word POSITIVE?

/Helena
“Live life Your way”
www.eminentcoaching.com

Did you know that the daily Positivity-teleclasses at ICA this week are free and that You are invited to participate? Go here to find out more, listen to the past Positivity teleclasses and sign up!

Positivity Week – Day 1

2009-03-24T14:46:00.003-03:00

When I watch the news on TV or read the newspapers I repeatedly find myself wishing that someone would start a news station or paper focusing on the positive.
There is so much negative reporting out there, and quite frankly it has lead me to avoid listening to and reading most news reports all together.

Many feel that this is even worse today. It’s like we are bombarded with negative messages about recession, economy, banks in trouble, companies going bankrupt, job losses etc.

Well, the really good news is that one organisation has decided to take action and do what they can to counter act all this negativity. The International Coach Academy has declared this week Positivity Week.
They are gathering trainers, students and alumni in one special teleclass per day each day this whole week (Monday March 23rd to Sunday March 29th). Every one of these classes will focus on positivity. Participants will be invited to share their stories. Students at ICA are also encouraged to post their messages of positivity on the academy’s discussion board. Both students and trainers are encouraged to bring an extra positive attitude to all the regular classes this week.
All this in an effort to raise as much positive energy as possible.

How does this involve you?
Well, to make sure the ripples of positivity expands outside the halls of ICA and into the world at large, clients and guests from outside of the academy are invited to participate in the Positivity Week teleclasses.
Go here for more information and to sign up for these free teleclasses and let some waves of positivity flow into your life.
Don’t worry because you missed the 1st teleclass on Positive tips & personal stories on Monday 23rd - a recording is posted on the sign-up page.

“See” you in class.

/Helena
“Live life Your way”
www.eminentcoaching.com

Learn more about International Coach Academy here.

What is a teleclass?
A teleclass is like an interactive conference call by phone. A facilitator keeps the call organized and directs a mix usually with some elements of lecturing, questions, and discussion involving the facilitator and volunteering particpants.
When you sign up for a teleclass you will either be sent to an information page with the phone number and an access code to phone in to the teleclass. Usually this information will also be sent to you by e-mail. You can phone in using your regular phone service in which case standard long distance charges apply or you can use any of the internet based phone services (Skype for instance).

Coaching – useful support in challenging times

2009-03-16T07:30:00.002-03:00

These days, when someone hears I work as a coach, I often get a comment on the lines of “I guess that is really needed nowadays..”. And I can only agree. It is.

During financially challenging times, like now, we are reminded that there are no such things as secure jobs, guaranteed ROIs in our savings accounts and pension funds, indefinitely increasing property values etc.
Here in lays an opportunity though, and for some a necessity, to “think outside of the box” and look for new options and other alternatives to how we want and can live our lives. How to earn our income? How to spend our time? What do we really value? What are our other needs?

If you can transform your feelings of concern and worry into input, then you can use your unsettled feelings to gain insight and information. You can use the instability around you to refocus on what is really important to you. What makes you feel secure? What do you need to adjust in your life to stay on top of the game?

And so yes, this is a time when coaching can be very useful. Having a coach means getting the support of someone who will focus fully on you, your needs, your situation, your values, your dreams and empower you to find your own solutions. Coaching is about movement, about getting you from where you are now to where you want to be.

I encourage you to make use of the support that coaching has to offer. It does not necessarily mean hiring a coach. You can get a lot of free coaching from signing up for newsletters and e-zines, check out coaches websites and reading their blogs and books.
And if you do want to explore the value of having your personal coach you can make use of the free 1st trial sessions many offer (including me – mine are called Taking Charge sessions), and find the kind of support that suits you.

Don’t get caught in the web of negativity, uncertainty and insecurity that is currently being spun around us. Stay in charge of your own life.

/Helena
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

More on making use of your worries and concerns to Empowering Fearlessness in Turbulent Times (a blogpost from coach Deah's Creative Alternatives)

Never overlook the good in a bad situation. (Zig Ziglar)

Wanted – peacefulness and life balance

2009-03-14T07:30:00.000-03:00

I had an electronic chat the other day with a student in Peking (I love how modern technology can bring people from all over the world in touch with each other).
Her reflections illustrated and reminded me of what similar challenges people experience across the globe.
So many of us today have concerns regarding finding balance in life.

Weather we are homemakers with small children, factory workers, professional athletes, CEOs or students, many of us have feelings of instability. And most of us seek the same thing to regain our balance – peacefulness, silence and being able to follow the truth in our own hearts in our everyday life.
I cannot help but wonder how much longer it is going to take our modern society to adjust to this fast pace and information overload that we are surrounded with today, and allow us some breathing space in our everyday lives.

Until it does though, we have to “fend for ourselves” and find our own ways of incorporating time to pause and carve out some space in our busy lives for peace and calm.

In this aspect I think many of us can learn something from this young student in Peking. Just imagine if more of us would live by:
- keeping our hearts open
- not quarrel with anyone
- accept and then solve
If we can support and encourage this kind of mindset and attitude in our children and youths, as well as in our own generations, I believe we can all look forward to a more peaceful and balanced society.

/Helena
“Live life Your way”
www.eminentcoaching.com

“I believe everyday is another new day and would like to share my happiness with everybody” (Sophy, student in Peking)

Your dreams can become your reality

2009-03-13T20:14:00.002-03:00

Do you know what the key is to transforming your dreams into reality?
I think you do. But, in case you have forgotten, or could use a reminder to nudge you over the threshold of your comfort zone, here is a short article of mine on the subject: Taking Action – the key to turning dreams into reality

Keep dreaming, keep realizing.

/Helena Berggren
“Live life Your way”
www.eminentcoaching.com

To plan, or not to plan – is it really a question?

2009-02-21T16:11:00.004-04:00

Some may argue that they do not, or do not want to, plan because they want to be free to be impulsive, to follow the spur of the moment, to choose from all the different things they enjoy doing etc.
Here in lies the paradox. If you are an active person and you have many different things you like to do, you may have to plan in order to be able to find the time to enjoy all your various activities.

I have a little reminder that pops up on my computer screen at a preset hour everyday. It reads “Structures give me freedom to enjoy and live my life the way I want..”. It pops up to remind me to prepare to finish up my work for the day (when I sit and work at my computer I can totally loose track of time) and follow the plan I have made for myself. A plan that makes sure I get to spend time on what matters most to me, on what needs to be done so I don’t get stressed, and in a way that ensures I live my life the way I need to in order to be happy, healthy and successful.

We all need to plan, to one extent or another. And we should. As Alina
Tyl says in her blogpost, What does planning have to do with sex?,
“..Planning is an important skill that may be used to be on a right track
again. Your goals will be easy to reach if you KNOW how to plan and
you LIKE to plan…”

Most of us have no problem with this with regard to our professional life. But the truth is that with the busy life style of today that many of us have, we also need to plan for our private life.
At different periods in our life, we give top priority to different things. It is often not our top priorities that are the problem. It is rather the other usually not so urgent, but important, things that get pushed aside, sometimes by our top priorities, unless we deliberately set aside time for them.
For example, as parents of small children, the children are usually our top priority and naturally take up a lot of our time. But quality time with our spouse/partner, though important to us, may easily due to that top priority become scarce, unless we plan for it.
Another example is business owners starting up. Getting the business running and profitable may be our top priority then. And we can easily end up working 24 hours a day on that business, neglecting important things like promoting our health and nurturing private relationships, again, unless we plan for it.
A third example may be when our children are all grown up and have moved out. We may then decide to put ourselves and our different hobbies as a priority. However, by having many different interests, we can easily get started on 10 different projects at the same time and never feel that we get to enjoy time with each one because there is always something else waiting to be continued or finished, unless we plan for it.

We have more knowledge than ever of how to live a healthy life, putting demands on our selves regarding both our mental and physical well being, to be added to what we already demand of ourselves with regard to work performance and quality relationships.
At the same time, the whole wide world has become accessible at our fingertips and demand our attention through new forums like e-mail, social forums on the internet and mobile phones.

If ever there was a time when we needed to plan to keep our lives in balance, I say it is now.

If you realize that planning could be a good thing for you, but you at the same time feel a resistance to it, then Alina Tyl has some tips in the above mentioned blogpost than can be really helpful. You just might discovery something you didn't know about yourself ;-).

/Helena Berggren
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

Listening – the gift of being heard

2009-02-17T08:29:00.003-04:00

What would happen if we now and then took time out in our busy schedules to just sit down and listen to a friend give words to the thoughts buzzing in their heads?
Without commenting, without offering to fix anything, without giving our point of view or telling him/her that he/she should do this or that.
But just listened, attentively, allowing them to sort through their feelings and reactions.
What if we just offered to be there?

Do you remember when you were a child and something exiting had happened or you had achieved or created something and just couldn’t wait to tell mom’ or dad’ about it? Can you recall the feeling from the times when they stopped what they were doing, kneeled beside you or sat down next to you, and listened as you described the event in question in all its glorious detail?
Have you had the privilege to experience it with your own children or even grandchildren? The joy in their faces and how they seem to climb higher and higher, feeling on top of the world for each time they get to recant their story to someone who really listens.

If you want to be reminded of the importance of, and how to be, a good listener you can read more in the article “Listening – the gift of being heard”.

/Helena
"Live life Your way"
www.eminentcoaching.com

A small gesture of compassion

2009-02-03T08:20:00.004-04:00

In this modern western society we sometimes complain about how people have become indifferent to one another and only focused upon them selves. But I have recently been shown that most people can have compassion also for strangers.

In the area where I live there is little interaction or communication between us neighbours, as in so many other neighbourhoods these days. Even though we nod a greeting to one another when we meet out in the neighbourhood, we rarely interact outside of occasional gatherings (like the fireworks display on New Year’s Eve and the spring bonfire on the last of April) and we generally only know the names of our neighbours just next door.

However, the other day I was reminded that this does not mean that we are indifferent to the lives of one another.
I met one of my next door neighbours and he told me he had just got word that one of the elderly ladies down the street had passed away, and so he was going to set out a candle in front of his house, as this was a tradition on our part of the street when someone has passed away. (We are new enough to the neighbourhood not to have experienced this previously so he wanted me to know what it was about).
I thought it was a lovely gesture and promised to contribute.
And sure enough, as darkness fell and we went out to set out our candle, we found the whole street to be lit with candles.
As I took the dog for a walk that evening I felt truly touched by all these people who took part in this small gesture of compassion, and lit a candle in memory of a fellow neighbour whose name they might not even have known.

From this I conclude that, even though we may keep mainly to our selves (I believe we Swedes are know for it), we are not indifferent to the lives of those around us. And when it is called for we might even venture outside of the privacy of our homes to show it.

Do you have some uplifting story of compassion for a stranger, that you can share?

/Helena
"Live life Your way"

Making something worth while out of your New Year’s Resolution

2009-01-19T09:50:00.004-04:00

How many New Year’s Resolutions have you uttered? How many have you actually realized? How many have you given up on a few months into the new year? How many have you forgotten about all together come August?

For example: To quit smoking can be a great New Year’s Resolutions, but it can also be a totally pointless one. If you look to the upcoming year and vision yourself fit, healthy, full of energy, with a glowing complexion and stamina and realize that one crucial step to make that vision a reality is to quit smoking, then great.
If, on the other hand, you look at the half burned down 10th cigarette of the new year’s party evening, feeling a bit dry in the mouth and getting reminded that this really is not good for you and you ought to give the habit up this upcoming year – well, I bet that resolution is forgotten, or at least postponed, the second someone offers you a new cigarette.

There really is no point in making New Years Resolutions based on what you ought to, what you should or what others tell you to etc. If your New Year’s Resolution is to be anything but a pointless statement out of tradition, it has to be something you feel really motivated to do. It has to lead you to somewhere you really want to go or to something you feel passionate about achieving. And it does not have to be uttered or formulated on New Year's Eve, but that is a great time to start thinking about it.

Imagine yourself back at New Year’s Eve, gazing up into the stars and as the light of the New Year’s fireworks fill the night sky feel all the joy, the anticipation, the positive energy towards a new start and imagine the upcoming year to be your best year ever.
Now take that momentum and search your heart. What would you love to do this year, how do you want to feel, what do you want to achieve?
Formulate it into statements, “I want to…”. Do it quietly in your mind, shout it out to the world, or write it down – what ever you feel like.
Reformulate your statements and repeat them, one by one, as “This year I am going to…”.
And finally, imagine yourself on New Year's Eve of 2009 and giving those same statements, but now formulated as “I am/I have …”

Can you feel how the statements ring truer for every time you repeat them? Which one warms your heart the most? Which one fills you with gratitude for life and pride in yourself? Which one makes you smile and fills you up with energy?
Make that one your New Year’s Resolution and you will have the best of chances for success.
For more ideas of how to turn your ideal, fabulous year of 2009 into reality check out my article: "9 Steps to Realizing Your New Year’s Resolutions”

/Helena
“Live life Your way”

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams” (Eleanor Roosevelt)

Inspirational travel planning

2009-01-08T09:13:00.003-04:00

I like to travel. Both in my imagination and in real life.
Part of the enjoyment of a trip is in the planning for me.
And of course, I like a “good bargain” as well as anybody, especially when I am going to travel with the whole family of 2 adults and 2 children.
I am also drawn like a magnet to just about anything with the word Inspiration in it.

Well, today I found all of the above without leaving the comfort of my home, at the KLM website for Sweden (in English).
Under Journeys of Inspiration I could go on a virtual trip with beautiful imagery and useful information, accompanied by delightful music.
Under Plan & Book your flight I found a very convenient tool to easily explore departure and return dates according to my schedule flexibility and financial preferences.

As overwhelming as the flood of information from the internet can be, there most certainly are pearls here and there that can brighten our day.

Do you like to travel? Have you found inspirational ways of enhancing your travel experience already at the planning stage?

/Helena
“Live life Your way”

“Life is constantly providing us with new funds, new resources, even when we are reduced to immobility. In life’s ledger there is no such thing as frozen assets.” (Henry Miller)

Pondering New Year’s Resolutions

2009-01-01T15:51:00.002-04:00

New Year’s Day dawned on me a little bit different than I had imagined.
Looking back on a year of several positive major changes to my life, I was looking forward to starting the New Year full of energy and ready to get moving on several new projects. Instead I found myself facing a major downturn in health, feeling more or less exhausted, causing me to having to hit the brakes hard.
Thus I have put myself in the coachee’s seat and instead of pondering over my new years resolutions for 2009 I find myself applying some basic coaching questions to my health issues:
 What is my health status right now?
 How would I ideally like to feel and have my health be?
 What needs to change or happen for me to transform my health status from where I am now to where I would ideally like to be?
 What specifically can I do to support myself and start moving towards realizing those changes?
And then it hits me. What if we applied such basic questions to our new year’s resolutions? What kind of an impact could that have on actually realizing our new year’s resolutions rather than having given up on or, even worse, forgotten about them only a few months into the new year?
So start visioning everybody. What will your ideal 2009 look like?
And stay tuned for in the near future I will present you with a tool of “X Steps to Realizing Your New Year’s Resolutions!"

Oh, and Happy New Year everybody!

/Helena
“Live Life Your Way”

Is your Christmas To-Do list overwhelming?

2008-12-16T08:10:00.003-04:00

Most of us think of Christmas traditions and activities as something joyful and the thought of them often bring a smile to our face. That is, right about to the second when we realise Christmas will be upon us in a very short time, and we have so much we need to do before then, that we have no idea how to find time for it all. Has your smile become a frowned forehead instead?
Well, I have some good news for you. I am convinced you can get to go through your Christmas activities experiencing that joyfulness that first brought a smile to your face. As with many things in life it only takes stopping for a minute or two, breaking it all down into little pieces and, with consideration for what is really important for you, focusing on one thing at a time.
Do you think it sounds easier said than done? Well, perhaps.
So here you will find an article with "6 Steps For a Joyful Introduction to Christmas" to make also the doing a little easier.

/Helena
"Live life Your way"

“Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of mind. To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas.” (Calvin Coolidge)

December - a harmonious introduction to Christmas?

2008-11-27T10:27:00.003-04:00

When I participated at an event the other week I posed the following question:

How often is Your December month a harmonious introduction to the Christmas holidays?

What would it mean to you if you could enjoy
- Christmas parties
- your children’s’ Christmas play
- Christmas shopping
without stress and on your terms?

I wanted to remind people that one can make use of coaching also in the short term, for instance to make sure all the nice Christmas traditions of December do not become stressful, but rather a time to put a little more emphasis on enjoying everyday life.

I was happy to notice, that just by posing the question, many appeared to realize that they themselves still could make an active choice for how their introduction to Christmas would be, for instance scheduling in order to make the Christmas activities something joyful and enjoyable rather than stressful and straining.
Others were positively surprised at the idea of coaching as a tool to achieve something so apparently simple, but significant, as a harmonious introduction to Christmas celebration.

Would you like help in finding your way to a harmonious Christmas on your terms?
Book a ”Take Charge of Your Life” coaching session (free introduction to coaching without any compulsory commitment to regular coaching) and/or sign up on my mailing list for newsletters, articles and other information on subjects of life inspiration. You will find contact information and opt-in here.

/Helena
”Live life Your way”

”Christmas, children, is not a date. It is a state of mind.” (Mary Ellen Chase)

An entire life in Perfection or in Problem?

2008-11-19T07:15:00.003-04:00

I was presented with an intereseting question the other day.
“If you had a choice between living your entire life in Perfection, versus your entire life in Problem which would you choose?”

I life in Perfection meaning not viewing life in terms of right versus wrong, good versus bad, but always balanced and always from a positive perspective.

The first things that come to mind when I imagine living my entire life in Perfection is Bliss, Harmony, Joy. Why on earth would I not choose to live life surrounded by that?

When considering an entire life in Problem I come to think of burden, heaviness, struggle. No one in their right mind would choose an entire life of that, would they?
But then what if it is from problems I learn, grow and develop. I want to do that. Then the choice is not so simple.

So how do problems make me learn, grow and develop? I look upon them as challenges, I explore other points of view to possibly see solutions, I watch how others deal with them and reflect on my own processes when working my way through them.
But that means they are not really problems at all, are they? Since I find meaning in them and advantages from facing them. They are only other expressions of a life in Perfection.

I guess that means I have already made the choice to live a life in Perfection.
How comforting that feels.

What would be your choice? An entire life in Perfection or an entire life in Problem? Why so?

/Helena

Perfection is a road,not a destination. Every time I live, I get an education. (Burk Hudson)

Eminent Coaching - Up and Running!

2008-11-14T05:08:00.002-04:00

My website is finally up and running again!

There is a lot to be added but all the basics are there: Who I am, How to get in touch with me, About my coaching, some Resources (Do You Know Your Top 3 Goals? – try out the free tool to assist you in getting clear on them).

I have several tools and book recommendations in store for you so there will be a lot of additions over the coming weeks.
Also my first Life Inspiration Newsletter will be sent out this month.

So I do encourage you to take the opportunity to Opt-in to my mailing list.
That way you will be notified both of new blog posts, additions to the web site, receive newsletters and other inspirational messages. (And just so you know, I dislike spam as much as most of you and promise never to give out any of your contact details to anyone else).

Drop by and check it out. And please, feel free to let me know what you think.
www.eminentcoaching.com

/Helena
“Live life Your Way”

Women – architects of change

2008-11-04T05:32:00.003-04:00

The other week I for the first time followed a live broadcast, via Internet, from the Women’s Conference in California.

To me, this amazing gathering of so many empowering and inspirational women, one after the other, who shared and spread their messages in speeches, lectures and conversations, created a wonderful surge of positive energy.

I will never forget Maria Shriver’s personal speech about overcoming our fears and the strength in facing them, the hopefull tone of the ”Once-In-A-Lifetime” conversation with Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice and Indra Nooyi, Chairmand & CEO for PepsiCo, and the engaging speech from Christiane Amanpour, CNN Chief International Correspondent.

And best of all. We can listen to the broadcasts from the conference as much as we want, when ever we want, through the website of www.californiawomen.org. Every time I stop by that website I recieve new motivation and empowerment.

With todays modern techique we have the opportunity to let the whole wide world come closer to us.
I do recommend a visit to www.californiawomen.org.

/Helena
”Live life the way You want”

”Fear isn’t weakness, it is the beginning of strength” (Maria Shriver)

You can choose!

2008-10-22T07:32:00.001-03:00

“Anything that you want in life can come within your reach if you choose to extend your arm and show that you want it.
You also have the choice to sit passively and wait, however that which you want might then miss you or pass you by or simply just not start to move at all.” Helena Berggren/Eminent Coaching

Don’t miss out on the positives of Today!

2008-10-17T05:29:00.004-03:00

I had a conversation with one of my neighbours the other day. We reflected on the positives and negatives of living in Sweden, Scandinavia versus Asia and Turkey. It made me aware of how my recent month in Asia has made me much more appreciative of several of the comforts we take for granted in our modern western everyday life (for instance that I can pour clean drinking water right out of the tap here in Sweden).

It is so easy to sit in one spot of the world getting annoyed over different little things that appear to make your everyday life harder then it should have to be. And then thinking that life would be better in another place, where you do not appear to have these particular things. And so you envy the people living at those other places, thinking they are experiencing a better life.

The danger with this of course, is that if you believe relocating is the answer to bettering your life, based on the fact that it means escaping different annoyances, there is great risk of getting very disappointed. Because, no doubt, there will be other challenges at your new location.

There are good things and less agreeable things in all societies, cultures, climates and locations.
So why not focus on the good at were you are at present and enjoy the experience of living where you are here and now, rather than dreaming of something else off in the future, and thereby missing out on the positives of today!

/Helena
“Live life the way You want”

“Most of us are just about as happy as we make up our minds to be.” (Abraham Lincoln)

Land of Smiles 3 – paradise beaches by Rayong

2008-10-09T15:04:00.003-03:00

The gentle sounds of waves rolling smoothly in to the beach shore. Turqoise and blue hues contrasting the white sand. This is the paradise image seen in the travel broschures, only this is not a photo – these are my current surroundings and I feel so privileged.

It’s hard to believe this is not some well frequented island full of resorts, but the beach stretch in proximity to the Thai town of Rayong.
Equally suprising that these longstretched beaches and clear waters are not jampacked with sunbathers. That there are actually only a handful of hotels and resorts, and those there are have very little occupancy. The view from a few floors up is stunning.

On weekdays, like this Thursday, numerous sun chairs stand empty here.
How come more people have not found their way here?
The climate is wonderful, the waters are crystal clear, the beaches are long stretched with soft white sand, plenty of sun chairs waiting under comfortable shades from the trees. And, we are only two hours drive from Bangkok!

I can’t help but wonder how this apparently almost non exploited beach stretch will look in a couple of years time.
But for now, I enjoy the privacy, relaxing in my sun chair undisturbed by salespeople and smiling at the memory of sighting a baby elephant being led for a walk along the beach shore.

/Helena
"Live life the way You want"

p.s. I am aware there is a problem with my website: www.eminentcoaching.com. It should be all fixed by next week. I will of course post here and let you know for sure when.

Efficiency without ”rushing through”

2008-10-07T14:58:00.005-03:00

Have you ever noticed how the pace ”picks up” when you go from the countryside or a smaller town to a larger city?
Suddenly everybody appears to be in a rush! It is almost impossible to just “stroll along”. It’s like the quick steps of everyone around pulls you into a fast flowing current.

Having enjoyed a calmer life here on the east coast of Thailand I was not particularly looking forward to switching to a faster pace, though there was much I wanted to experience in Bangkok.
However, I found that even though Bangkok most certainly is a large modern city, and things appear to move more efficiently here than in Thailand in general, I felt no stress, no rush.

Even though most things about Bangkok is “a lot” (as my 5 ½ year old son put it) – a lot of people, a lot of traffic, a lot of buildings, a lot of smells, a lot of shops, a lot of food outlets, a lot of temples – there didn’t appear to be any rush.
Sure, people walked a bit faster at the sky train station in the rush hour, but there was no hurry or strain in their faces.
Men and women of all ages took the time to stop by points of worship, not just for a quick prayer, but to buy some flowers, light a candle and sit down in contemplation for a while.

Apparently rushing is not a necessity for efficiency (Bangkok is full of thriving businesses and entrepreneurial spirit). And I find this to be reassuring.

I have no desire to go back to a fast paced life spent in overdrive, but I am full of inspiration and ideas about things I want to do and accomplish.

So, what if You took all the energy previously spent on worrying about all the non completed items on your to do lists and put it into whatever you are doing at the moment.
What would come out of that?
How would that feel?
What would you experience?
How would it be different from how you have lived previously?

I, for one, find this to be much more in alignment with how I wish to live my life – fully experiencing the present moment, staying focused and thereby being much more efficient in the areas of my life that I really feel passionate about and value the most.

/Helena
"Live life the way You want"

Music for Inspiration and Soothing of the soul!

2008-10-01T02:00:00.001-03:00

Did you watch the Passion Day Movie yesterday?
Did you enjoy the wonderful music as much as the insightful and inspirational quotes and imagery?

I most certainly did. So much so that I found myself going back to the Passion Day Movie time and time again just to listen.
I found the music to be both inspirational and soothing for my soul.
So I decided to find out more.

The music of the Passion Day Movie is the work of cellist and composer Shaun Paul and comes from his latest release "Everlasting".
If you enjoyed it as much as I did you can find out more at:www.shaunpaul.com

Stay inspired!

Helena

p.s. If you havent got the chance to see the Passion Day Movie yet, you can here.

Did you know – Today is International Passion Day?

2008-09-30T02:00:00.001-03:00

Today is a day of celebration.

A day for spreading inspiration and the wonders that come from living your passions and bestowing Your unique gifts upon the world.

Let us create positive ripples all over the world!

Join in the celebration of International Passion Day.

A wonderful place to begin is here with the Passion Day Movie.
Enjoy!

Helena

There is a special celebration coming up

2008-09-29T06:57:00.002-03:00

My website, www.eminentcoaching.com , is still ”a work in progress” with new additions every other week. Now you can subscribe to my mailinglist though and get information about news and updates, both on the website and here on the blog, right in your own mailbox.

There is a special celebration coming up on September 30th so if you sign up right away you will be in time to catch the special mailings I’ve got prepared for this.

I also welcome input and ideas for what kind of information you would like to see on the website. So do take a look around, but bear in mind it is still “under construction”.

Write you soon,
Helena

“One can never pay in gratitude; one can only pay “in kind” somewhere else in life.” Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Land of Smiles 2 – Pace

2008-09-23T14:00:00.002-03:00

You cannot rush when the temperature holds above 30˚C.
You cannot help but to slow your steps when the sun is basking.
You cannot feel sad when everywhere you turn you are greeted with a smile.
You cannot help but to relax when the rain feels like a warm gentle shower.

Spending time here in Thailand is the best anti-stress treatment I can get.

You cannot plan a busy schedule when 2 o’clock does not mean sharp, but might as well be a quarter to or 20 minutes past.
You cannot help but to turn inward and reflect when not every minute is allocated.

When spending time here in Thailand I do not just light the scented candle, but also take the time to enjoy it.

Why do we in the modern western world run so fast?
Why do we feel there are so many things we need to accomplish in such little time?

What would happen if we paced down?
What would we value if we took the time to search our feelings?

Having experienced both, I definitely prefer the gentle stride of Asia to the running steps of the western world.

How about You?

Live life the way You want
/Helena

“Circumstance has no power over you. Your inner weather is always and forever at your command” Olga Rosmanith

Land of smiles 1 – Courtesy

2008-09-21T14:49:00.003-03:00

Anyone who has visited Thailand, or most other Asian countries for that matter, will have noticed the courteous greetings, with hands palm to palm in front of their chest and a gentle bow of the head. If you have spent some time here, and paid attention, you will have registered that the height at which the hands are held varies. This, in accordance with the level of importance (and therefore how much respect they want to show) a Thai person bestows upon the person he greets.
Whilst this traditional way of greeting people does not seem to be expected of us foreigners to adapt, I am surprised that so many expats and returning tourists manages to pick up so very few phrases and customs.
A little can go such a long way here.
One of the first phrases I learned in Thai, after the basic hello (sawadee-kha/khrap), was to say “No, thank you” (mai kha).
This proved to be very useful with the pushy sales people bothering tourists on the beach. (When I responded to their offerings in Thai they seemed to judge me to be less of a gullible tourist and kept their distance from me and my family only to approach when invited).
But more importantly, I have noted that when responding politely saying “no thank you” in Thai to the sales person in the store and not to mention the eager cab driver who wants to offer me his services, I am in return rewarded with a “thank you” and exceptionally good service if I venture back to the same location.

What simple phrases, in native tongue, have you experienced makes a difference in the countries you have visited?

Live life the way You want!
/Helena

“Learn to live, and live to learn, ignorance like a fire doth burn, little tasks make large return.” Bayard Taylor

The Power of Intention

2008-09-20T13:53:00.004-03:00

I am back for the fourth time in Thailand. Each time I, or my fiancée and I, plan for our next visit our stays are being extended and the intervals between them are becoming shorter.
This time around it is not to stay in a rented condo, not at a resort or hotel, not at my parents in law – this time it is with the purpose of signing a long term lease contract for a house of our own. A clear statement to our intention of more frequent stays here. And there it is – the Power of Intention.
I am reminded of how I about one year ago put some effort into deep soul searching (aided by the steps set forth in the Passion test book) and found my Top 5 Passions in life. In defining some markers (indicators) of living in alignment with my 4th passion I wrote “..homes..in both Sweden and Thailand.” And here I am, only one year later, having locked the door to my house in Sweden and about to unlock the door to my house in Thailand. Wow!
Boy am I going to keep working on clearly stating what intentions I have for my life.

What are youre goals in life? What intentions are you setting for your future?

Live life the way You want!
/Helena

“No man that does not see visions will ever realize any high hope or undertake any high enterprise.” Woodrow Wilson

Ask for tools – gain empowerment

2008-09-12T12:06:00.002-03:00

I came to watch an episode of ”supernanny” the other day. It featured a single mother of four and a household in turmoil.
There was no question that the mother new things had to change and she was obviously willing to commit to enforcing changes.
She was just so tired she could not clearly see where to begin or what steps to take. As she was at a loss as to what to do, in her exhaustion, she just resigned to the whole situation and so the chaos continued.

As she was presented with tools to help her change things around, one could se her energy level rising. This in turn gave her persistence enough (with the support of the “coaching” nanny of course) to make use of the tools.
And as she saw the effects, and things gradually began to change, one could really sense her feeling of empowerment, as she regained control of the situation.

This story reminded me of how we all can get caught up in circumstances that drain our energy to the point where we cannot se any way out, even though in reality there might be several options.
It is not that we have suddenly lost all intelligence and need someone to tell us how to live our lives.
It is not that we have become mentally ill (even though it can feel as if you are going insane at times ;-) and need a therapist to get back on track.
It is just that we need some support.
Someone to help us back to focus, to suggest the tools that can enable us to see the options.
Someone to remind us that it does not have to stay as it is – we all have the capacity and knowledge to find our way through.
I feel so privileged to work as a coach and often being that someone.

/Helena

“We can practice leadership principles, but the only way to learn to use them is to lead. Not knowing it all is no excuse not to start.” Judy Columbus

p.s. Useful tools for identifying what you really value in life and feel passionate about are in the book the Passion Test.
Other ideas for useful tools will be coming up on my website, Eminent Coaching, in the near future.
Curious about the TVshow – go to: www.supernanny.com

Is coaching something for You?

2008-08-27T06:33:00.002-03:00

I am sometimes asked Who can benefit from coaching?

My answer is just about anyone, at one point or another in life, regardless of whether you feel successful or challenged.

If you are one of those blessed with self confidence in your ability to accomplish whatever you set out to do – great. Congratulations. And you know what, coaching can work as a great short cut for you.

If you are one of those who are proud of always having fended for yourself, I commend you on your resolve and tenacity. Imagine what you could do and accomplish if you added the support and inspiration from a coach.

If, on the other hand, you feel stuck or trapped in your everyday life, coaching can be about reintroducing your dreams into your present reality, of transforming challenges to opportunities.

Coaching is, however, not necessarily about getting over obstacles or facing challenges in life.
If you feel you are already well on your way, it can be about enjoying the journey. It can be about taking your life from good to fabulous, your career from success to outstanding.

The best judge of whether coaching is something for You, or not, is You. Many professional coaches offer free trial sessions without any obligations. Try one out, or why not a few. All coaches are different, as is every client.

Find one that works for you! It just might be that key to realizing your dream.

/Helena

“It is the greatest shot of adrenaline to be doing what you’ve wanted to do so badly. You almost feel like you could fly without the plane.” Charles Lindbergh

Acknowledgement

2008-08-05T03:15:00.002-03:00

Do you remember when you were a child, learning new skills? Was there someone who supported you along the way, who acknowledge you’re every effort? A parent perhaps.
How did that make you feel? How do you think it affected your progress?

Do you remember that cocky classmate in school? You know the one who always talked about his or her own achievements. Do you remember with what self confidence he or she took on new challenges?

Now look at yourself today. How quickly do you learn new things? How much effort do you put in? Do you even try? How easily do you give up? How is your self confidence?

What is different for the enthusiastic motivated children we once were compared to the hesitant adults so many of us have become? What happened to the tenacity and eagerness to learn? Why are we as adult so hesitant and afraid to step out of our comfort zone?
How about acknowledgement. How often do someone acknowledge you for what You have achieved, accomplished, said or done? Today, in your adult life that is.
How often do You pat yourself on the back, or any other adult for that matter?
Compare it to how we act towards children. How much acknowledgement do we not give to our children? And how much doesn’t our children achieve and accomplish in short periods of time? See what I am getting at?

If you think about a time in your adult life when you were given acknowledgement. How did it make you feel?
Compare it to how it makes you feel when you are making efforts without acknowledgement?

So what do you think your life would be like if you were to receive 50% more acknowledgement than you do today? How would it feel for your spouse/partner/friend/co-worker if he or she were to receive 50% more acknowledgement in his or her life?

So how do you get more acknowledgment? I bet you can guess. You give it!

Why not try a game around the kitchen table next time your family gathers?
Go around the table and let each member acknowledge another member of the family for something he or she did during the day.
Ex. “I want to acknowledge your mother for trying so hard to get all the holiday laundry done”
“I want to acknowledge John for having the courage to face up to dad’ and admit he was the one to break the vase”
“I want to acknowledge your father for deciding to do some work from home later this evening instead of staying late at the office, so he could spend some extra time with you children”

Now then. What can you acknowledge yourself for today? Who are you going to acknowledge tomorrow?

/Helena

“We are each of us angels with only one wing. And we can only fly embracing each other.” Luciano de Crescenzo

Starting a new

2008-08-04T04:48:00.001-03:00

New beginnings. Isn’t it strange how autumn can arrive over night. This morning I walked my children to day care. Summer holidays are thus over and everyday life is about to start again. As to put a bit of extra emphasis on this the trees have begun to shed leaves in different yellow, burned, colours. The stores advertise sale on the sale and the shopping windows are displaying autumn fashion.
I have always loved this time of year. The feeling of starting a new. As the winds blow in with fresher air I feel inspired, filled with good intentions and eager to get started. The mental relaxation from everyday life during the summer holiday has given me distance and opened up new perspectives. Time to start a new.
This year it is not just the ordinary inspiring feeling of starting a new. This year it is a thorough sense of - now is the start of the rest of my life.
This past year has meant so much fundamental changes; in my view of how I want to live, what I want to do, what I need to feel well, in my outlook on my possibilities to realize my dreams, in the definition of my passions in life.
It feels like I have spent the last months planning a trip and now, finally, I walk towards the passport control.

What does your upcoming everyday autumn look like? Have you found new inspiration and strength during the summer?

/Helena

"I say if it's going to be done, let's do it. Let's not put it in the hands of fate. Let's not put it in the hands of someone who doesn't know me. I know me best. Then take a breath and go ahead." Anita Baker

A 30 seconds reply to: What I as a coach offer you

2008-07-24T03:00:00.001-03:00

As your coach I help you find your inspirations for living Your life the way You want.

I will not tell you what to do – I will not advice you – What I will do is listen to You. I will listen to what you are saying, to what you are feeling, to what you want, to what hinders you, to what motivates you and so forth.

I will pose questions to you, in order to help you find Your answers, solutions and ideas. Together we will create action plans and put tools in your hands, to get you focused and motivated to take the steps to realizing the changes You need or want to make.

/Helena

I now have new time slots available for Free "Taking Charge of Your Life" Coaching Sessions in July/August. You are hereby invited to find out what coaching is and what it can do for You. Get in touch!
e-mail: helena@eminentcoaching.com
skype: helena.berggren
phone: +46-6-519 71 017

Children’s Perspective

2008-06-28T17:19:00.002-03:00

”Don’t be so grown upish”.
The word, “grown upish”, is the invention of my 5 year old son. And it strikes me how logical as well as “describing” it is. For one thing it tells me I have probably strayed a bit too far away from my inner child lately.
Childish versus “grown upish”.
I smile. And then I sit down, on the floor as to be able to physically look around from the point of view of my children. I find it quite interesting to see the proportions things take on (and how dust collects in places I was blissfully unaware of ;-).

I further expand my little exercise by closing my eyes and visualizing how the world and the everyday life of my sons, appears from their perspective.
I first become acutely aware of how many things I, as a child, am told how and when to do. I then can imagine the enormous sense of empowerment, I as a 4 or 5 year old, experience on the occasions when I am presented with choice and actually get to have a say in things. Then the feeling of accomplishment when I dress and groom myself in the morning. How the energy around me changes when mom’ and dad’ declares we are running late and need to hurry. The joy when mom’ or dad’ sits down with me on the floor to play. The feeling of comfort and safety when I crawl in to my parent’s bed after having stumbled through the dark hall in the middle of the night. The excitement of watching a simple thing as a spider spin his web. How much older I feel when I discover I can reach higher up to yet another shelf.

I open my eyes and slowly get up on my feet. I return to my adult perspective with new insights and a realization of how much of an impact I still have on the every day lives of my children. Just as any other mother I of course truly want the best for my children. Less stress and more patience offering my children more opportunities for making their own choices, suddenly feels very important.

I also make a promise to myself to now and then pause – and look around me from the perspective of my children. What would I like to look and feel different to them?

How does the world look from your children’s/grandchildren’s perspective?
What would you like them to see?

Love,
Helena

The power of shifting perspective

2008-06-26T10:23:00.000-03:00

I recently read a very powerful statement: ” Your perspective determines your experience in life, not your circumstances”.

I so very strongly agree with this statement due to my own personal experience, as well as what I have witnessed in other people. And I hope to help my clients shift their perspectives to truly empowering ones.

I experienced the power of shifting my perspectives when I went from having an idea of what my values and priorities in life were, but thinking I could not live them due to circumstances -> to clearly identifying and putting my values and priorities first and thereby seeing how I could gradually change my circumstances to align with them.
A year later I had a clear vision of what my top passions in life were and what mattered the most to me. And I am now on my way to living my ideal life, just by shifting my perspective - from focusing on how my circumstances hindered me, to focusing on how to apply my values and priorities on my circumstances.

In my case it took a serious downfall in my health, I actually drove myself to Burn out, before I managed to shift my perspective. So I acknowledge that it is not always an easy thing to do.
But I choose to make it one of my missions in life to master the art of shifting my outlook on the events and issues that life brings me.
That is really what it is about, a choice. A choice of what an event means to you, a choice of how to use a situation rather than to be a victim of it.
Because I believe that if I can master this, than ANYTHING will be possible.
If my perspective determines my experience in life, then I want to do everything possible to ensure that my perspectives are as empowering as possible.

Just imagine, what would your life be like if you were always to choose an empowering perspective on the circumstances in your life?

Love,
Helena

“There is no object so foul that intense light will not make it beautiful.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

Empowerment from interacting with likeminded

2008-06-18T10:33:00.002-03:00

I have just come back from a first meeting of a small group of likeminded individuals exploring spirituality. And I have come home feeling empowered.

Exploring where this feeling of empowerment is coming from, I recall other times in my life when I felt a similar sense of empowerment.
 After a training at a junior swim club in my teens
 After socializing with classmates at university
 After meeting with first time mothers
 After a scrap booking workshop
 After a marketing seminar
 After a workout at the yoga studio
 After a mediumship workshop

What do these points in time all have in common? They are all connected to some significant change or development in my life.
 Going from playful pool visits to professional swim training
 Starting studies at the university
 Becoming a mother
 Taking up a new hobby/craft
 Introducing a new marketing strategy to my business
 Taking up yoga practice
 Exploring spirituality

By connecting with a group of likeminded individuals, going through the change becomes so much easier.
Interacting with people who do not question my choice of change or development, but who remind me that I am not the only one going through the process, who share their concerns, questions, reflections, answers and ideas on the subject – all this makes me feel empowered in my process of change.
And it comes from belonging to a “support group”.

What changes are you making?
Have you considered joining a group of individuals in the process of going through similar changes/development, that is, who share the same interest as you at this time?
Experience the empowerment and positive energy of interacting in a group with the same focus! Coach each other!

Good luck!
Helena

"Only in growth, reform, and change, paradoxically enough, is true security to be found" (Anne Morrow Lindbergh)

What is Coaching?

2008-06-15T10:00:00.001-03:00

What coaching is can be expressed in as many ways as there are coaches.
My way of defining what I offer you as your coach currently reads like this:

"As your coach I help you find Your inspirations for living Your life the way You want"

I do this by either
"Helping you identify what changes You want to make in Your life, create an action plan to realize those changes and give you support along the way",

or/and by
"helping you identify Your passions and values in life and discover how You can change Your every day life to align with those passions and values".

So,
How would You like to live your life?
What would You like to change?
What do You feel Passionate about?

/Helena

You can find a more general expression of what coaching is on ICF's (International Coaching Federation's) Q&A page: http://www.coachfederation.org/ICF/For+Coaching+Clients/What+is+a+Coach/FAQs/

I choose to coach!

2008-06-13T06:24:00.004-03:00

So, it is hereby official. I have chosen the path of working professionally as a coach - and it brings a great smile to my face just saying it.

Life has put me through some tough challenges the past couple of years, but as the saying goes, "I have come out stronger".
I've also come to realize that their is great potential in eatch and everyone of us, as well as in the world around us. We may not always see it and we may at times doubt it's presence, but it is there.
And for those times when we have a hard time finding it, there is a vast number of wonderful tools around to bring it all to light. Not "one solution fits all" but rather different tools for different people att differing situations. Tools that can not just make life easier, but inspireing, joyfull, rewarding and everything you can imagine it to be. And the best ones are free, because they lay within you.
It is my great pleasure and joy to offer my services, to help bring out and shine a light on your potential for living an extraordinary life!